Feemy raised her eyes, and clasped her hands, as she listened to
Father John's words, and marked his solemn tones. No thought of Thady
entered her mind; but some indefinite, half-conceived idea respecting
Ussher--that he had not been killed--that he had come to life
again--that some mysterious miracle, such as she had read of
in novels, had taken place; and that Father John had come with
some blessed news, which might yet restore her to happiness and
tranquillity. The illusion was but for a moment, though during that
moment it completely took possession of her. It was as speedily
dispelled by Father John's concluding words--
"I mean from your brother."
Feemy gave a long, long sigh as she heard the word. She wished for no
message from her brother; he had robbed her of everything; she could
not think of him without horror and shuddering.
"He sends his kindest love to you. I told him you were better, and he
was very glad to hear it. Though he has many heavy cares of his own
to bear, I have never seen him but he asks after your health with
more anxiety than he thinks of his own prospects. Now you are better,
Feemy, won't you send him some message by me?--some kind word, which
may comfort him in his sorrow?"
Feemy was no hypocrite; hypocrisy, though she did not know it
herself, was distasteful to her. She had no kind feelings for her
brother, and she did not know how to make the pretence which might
produce kind words; so she remained silent.
"What! not a word, Feemy? you who spoke so well, so properly, so
affectionately, but now of that good friend of yours--have you not a
word of kindness for a most affectionate brother?"
Feemy still remained silent.
"Why, Feemy, what is this? Don't you love your own brother?"
She said nothing in reply for a moment or two; and then, bursting
into tears, she exclaimed,
"Don't scold me, Father John!--don't scold me now, or I shall die!
I try to forgive him--I am always trying! But why did he--why did
he--why did he--" She was unable to finish her sentence from the
violence of her sobs and the difficulty of uttering the words which
should have concluded it. She meant to say, "Why did he kill my
lover?"
"Don't agitate yourself, Feemy. I don't mean to scold you; I don't
mean even to vex you more than I can possibly help; but I must speak
to you about your brother. I see the feeling that is in your mind,
and I will not blame you for it, for I believe it is natural; but
I beseech you to pray that your heart may be softened towards your
brother, who instead of repugnance, deserves from you the warmest
affection. But though I will not attempt to control your feelings,
I must tell you that you will be most wicked if you allow them
to interfere with the performance of your duties. You know your
brother's trial is coming on, do you not?"
"Yes."
"Wednesday fortnight next is the day fixed, I believe. You know you
will have to be a witness?"
"I believe so, Father John."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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