The Man Upstairs and Other StoriesWodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
General
The Man Upstairs and Other Stories
Wodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
Humorous stories, English
They seemed to know Peggy at Rector's. Paul, the head waiter, beamed
upon her paternally. One or two men turned and looked after her as she
passed. The waiters smiled slight but friendly smiles. Rutherford,
intent on her, noticed none of these things.
Despite her protests, he ordered an elaborate and expensive supper. He
was particular about the wine. The waiter, who had been doubtful about
him, was won over, and went off to execute the order, reflecting that
it was never safe to judge a man by his clothes, and that Rutherford
was probably one of these eccentric young millionaires who didn't care
how they dressed.
'Well?' said Peggy, when he had finished.
'Well?' said Rutherford.
'You're looking brown, George.'
'I've been away in the Catskills.'
'Still as strong on the rube proposition as ever?'
'Yes. But Broadway has its points, too.'
'Oh, you're beginning to see that? Gee, I'm glad to be back. I've had
enough of the Wild West. If anybody ever tries to steer you west of
Eleventh Avenue, George, don't you go. There's nothing doing. How have
you been making out at your writing stunt?'
'Pretty well. But I wanted you. I was lost without my mascot. I've got
a story in this month's _Wilson's_. A long story, and paid
accordingly. That's why I'm able to go about giving suppers to great
actresses.'
'I read it on the train,' said Peggy. 'It's dandy. Do you know what you
ought to do, George? You ought to turn it into a play. There's a heap
of money in plays.'
'I know. But who wants a play by an unknown man?'
'I know who would want _Willie in the Wilderness_, if you made it
into a play, and that's Winfield Knight. Ever seen him?'
'I saw him in _The Outsider_. He's clever.'
'He's It, if he gets a part to suit him. If he doesn't, he don't amount
to a row of beans. It's just a gamble. This thing he's in now is no
good. The part doesn't begin to fit him. In a month he'll be squealing
for another play, so's you can hear him in Connecticut.'
'He shall not squeal in vain,' said Rutherford. 'If he wants my work,
who am I that I should stand in the way of his simple pleasures? I'll
start on the thing tomorrow.'
'I can help you some too, I guess. I used to know Winfield Knight. I
can put you wise on lots of things about him that'll help you work up
Willie's character so's it'll fit him like a glove.'
Rutherford raised his glass.
'Peggy,' he said, 'you're more than a mascot. You ought to be drawing a
big commission on everything I write. It beats me how any of these
other fellows ever write anything without you there to help them. I
wonder what's the most expensive cigar they keep here? I must have it,
whatever it is. _Noblesse oblige_. We popular playwrights mustn't
be seen in public smoking any cheap stuff.'
* * * * *
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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