The Man Upstairs and Other StoriesWodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
General
The Man Upstairs and Other Stories
Wodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
Humorous stories, English
It will, therefore, be readily understood that Archibald's inability to
do a hole in single figures did not handicap him at Cape Pleasant as it
might have done at St. Andrews. His kindly clubmates took him to their
bosoms to a man, and looked on him as a brother. Archibald's was one of
those admirable natures which prompt their possessor frequently to
remark: 'These are on me!' and his fellow golfers were not slow to
appreciate the fact. They all loved Archibald.
Archibald was on the floor of his bedroom one afternoon, picking up the
fragments of his mirror--a friend had advised him to practise the
Walter J. Travis lofting shot--when the telephone bell rang. He took up
the receiver, and was hailed by the comfortable voice of McCay, the
club secretary.
'Is that Mealing?' asked McCay. 'Say, Archie, I'm putting your name
down for our championship competition. That's right, isn't it?'
'Sure,' said Archibald. 'When does it start?'
'Next Saturday.'
'That's me.'
'Good for you. Oh, Archie.'
'Hello?'
'A man I met today told me you were engaged. Is that a fact?'
'Sure,' murmured Archibald, blushfully.
The wire hummed with McCay's congratulations.
'Thanks,' said Archibald. 'Thanks, old man. What? Oh, yes. Milsom's her
name. By the way, her family have taken a cottage at Cape Pleasant for
the summer. Some distance from the links. Yes, very convenient, isn't
it? Good-bye.'
He hung up the receiver and resumed his task of gathering up the
fragments. Now McCay happened to be of a romantic and sentimental
nature. He was by profession a chartered accountant, and inclined to be
stout; and all rather stout chartered accountants are sentimental.
McCay was the sort of man who keeps old ball programmes and bundles of
letters tied round with lilac ribbon. At country houses, where they
lingered in the porch after dinner to watch the moonlight flooding the
quiet garden, it was McCay and his colleague who lingered longest.
McCay knew Ella Wheeler Wilcox by heart, and could take Browning
without anaesthetics. It is not to be wondered at, therefore, that
Archibald's remark about his fiancee coming to live at Cape Pleasant
should give him food for thought. It appealed to him.
He reflected on it a good deal during the day, and, running across
Sigsbee, a fellow Cape Pleasanter, after dinner that night at the
Sybarites' Club, he spoke of the matter to him. It so happened that
both had dined excellently, and were looking on the world with a sort
of cosy benevolence. They were in the mood when men pat small boys on
the head and ask them if they mean to be President when they grow up.
'I called up Archie Mealing today,' said McCay. 'Did you know he was
engaged?'
'I did hear something about it. Girl of the name of Wilson, or--'
'Milsom. She's going to spend the summer at Cape Pleasant, Archie tells
me.'
'Then she'll have a chance of seeing him play in the championship
competition.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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