At the same instant, the servant rushed into the room, crying, "Oh, Sir!
Oh, Madame! It's the Frenchman of the three coffins! Jesus! Mary, Mother
of God!"
Fougas saluted them, and said, "Don't disturb yourselves, good people, I
beg of you. We've a little matter to discuss together, and I'm ready to
explain it to you in two words. You're in a hurry, so am I; you've not
had supper, neither have I!"
Frau Meiser, more rigid and more emaciated than a thirteenth-century
statue, opened wide her toothless mouth. Terror paralyzed her. The man,
better prepared for the visit of the phantom, cocked his revolver under
the table and took aim at the Colonel, crying "_Vade retro, Satanas!_"
The exorcism and the pistol missed fire together.
Meiser was not at all discouraged: he snapped the six barrels one after
the other at the demon, who stood watching him do it. Not one went off.
"What devilish game is that you're playing?" said the Colonel, seating
himself astride a chair. "People are not in the habit of receiving an
honest man's visit with that ceremony!"
Meiser flung down his revolver, and grovelled like a beast at Fougas'
feet. His wife, who was not one whit more tranquil, followed him. They
joined hands, and the fat man exclaimed:
"Spirit! I confess my misdeeds, and I am ready to make reparation for
them. I have sinned against you; I have violated my uncle's commands.
What do you wish? What do you command? A tomb? A magnificent monument?
Prayers? Endless prayers?"
"Idiot!" said Fougas, spurning him with his foot; "I am no spirit, and I
want nothing but the money you've robbed me of!"
Meiser kept rolling on the floor; but his scrawny wife was already on
her feet, her fists on her hips, and facing Fougas.
"Money!" cried she, "But we don't owe you any! Have you any documents?
Just show us our signature! Where would one be, Just God! if we had to
give money to all the adventurers who present themselves? And in the
first place, by what right did you thrust yourself into our dwelling, if
you're not a spirit? Ah! you're a man just the same as other people! Ha!
ha! So you're not a ghost! Very well, sir; there are judges in Berlin;
there are some in the country, too, and we'll soon see whether you're
going to finger our money! Get up there, you great booby; it's only a
man! And do you, Mister Ghost, get out of here! Off with you!"
The Colonel did not budge more than a rock.
"The devil's in women's tongues! Sit down, old lady, and take your hands
away from my eyes--they bother me. And as for you, swell-head, get on to
your chair, and listen to me. There will be time enough to go to law if
we can't come to an understanding. But stamped paper stinks in my
nostrils; and therefore I'd rather settle peaceably."
Herr and Frau Meiser repressed their first emotion. They distrusted
magistrates, as do all people without clean consciences. If the Colonel
was a poor devil who could be put off with a few thalers, it would be
better to avoid legal proceedings.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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