'No. Not from the cold at least. He's so hurt and confused, I
wanted him to know at least that he is free.' He came closer, and she
saw that he was shivering. She put another fur around his shoulders and
made him sit by the fire, which she then repaired.
'He means a lot to you, doesn't he?'
'Yes. Perhaps even more than Akar did to you.'
She sat beside him. 'How do you mean?'
'In him I see myself, and I can love..... It's not his fault that
he's helpless now. He's only trying to survive, friendless and
lost.'
'But you're not friendless.'
'I know.'
She saw that he wrestled with strong emotions, and said no more. At
length he took her hand, kissed it, and asked her.
'If Akar is not successful today. . .or even if he is. Could you go
to the second reserve again?'
'Yes. But why, if Akar brings us meat?'
'He hunts for you, myself until I am better, and the cub. That is
burden enough. Please believe it is best. The tiger needs meat, and he
must take it from me.' Again, though she did not understand, she knew
that deep currents were at work in him.
A short time later Akar did return, carrying in his mouth some kind of
field-bird. As Kalus let him in the wolf took it not to the girl, as
was his custom (he had not even acknowledged the man-child's
presence), but instead went to a corner by himself and lay down with it,
plucking out the feathers with his teeth, and eating as if he were alone
in the chamber. The pup, upon waking, jumped down from the woman's
bed and approached him, her tail wagging in eager solicitation. He did
not rebuff her, but made her wait until he had eaten his fill. Then he
rose and went out again, passing Sylviana without gesture or affection,
bristling slightly as he drew a sullen half-circle past the tiger. The
woman closed the door again, confused.
'What was that all about? What was he trying to say?'
'Something he's been telling us for weeks, since the death of
Kamela, and before.'
'What?' She knew, deep down.
'That he must leave us soon. That his place is with the pack, his
real kindred. They need him now as much as we do. I think that only
his shoulder---'
'It's not TRUE.' She sat down on the floor, a forlorn bundle in
a world made suddenly colder. 'He wouldn't leave us like
this.' She tried to rationalize, arguing with whom she did not know.
'You're not able to hunt.'
'No, but I will be soon, with as much chance as he. And you can live
on sebreum.'
'But Alaska,' she insisted (the name she had given the pup).
'He knows I will not let her starve. I'm sorry, Sylviana. But
his place is with his own kind.'
'It's not fair.' Her eyes would not stop filling.
Kalus picked up the fur she had discarded, and gently replaced it around
her shoulders. He put his hand on her head shyly, feeling unworthy, and
unable to do more. But beneath his breath he made this vow.
'So long as there is life inside me, you will never be alone.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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