"O noble heart! as pure as heaven!" cried the Marquis. "I accept, for my
part, this divine sacrifice. Pray do not scorn me for that! You make me
feel worthy of it, and I will soon put an end to it. Yes, yes! I shall
work miracles. I feel strong enough now. My mother will yield without a
regret. In my heart I feel now the faith and the power that shall
persuade her to it. But even if the whole world should rise up to
condemn you,--do you see?--you, my sister and my daughter, my
pure-minded companion, my dearest friend,--you will only stand the
higher in my regard. I shall only be more and more proud of you. What is
the world, what is public opinion, to a man who has penetrated the
social life of past ages and that of the present as well, fathoming the
mysteries of their selfishness and the nothingness of their deceit? Such
a man knows full well that, at all times, by the side of one poor truth
which floats safely, a thousand truths go under with the mark of infamy
upon them. He well knows that the best and most unselfish spirits have
walked in the footprints of their Lord, on a thorny path, where wounds
and insults fall like rain. Well, we will walk there, if need be; love
will keep us from feeling these base attacks. Yes, I can answer for
that, at least, and this is what I can swear in defiance of all threats
from that destiny the world would make for us: you shall be loved, and
you shall be happy! You knew me well, cruel one, shutting your eyes as
you ran away. You knew perfectly that my whole life, my whole soul is
love and nothing else. You knew perfectly that, if I have sometimes been
eager in pursuit of truth, it was from love of her alone; and not for
the vain glory of proclaiming her in person. I am not myself a scholar;
I am not an author. I am an unknown soldier, who, of my own free will,
avoid the noise and smoke of the conflict, fighting unsupported and in
the background, not through lack of courage, but that my mother and
brother may not be wounded in the struggle. I have accepted this obscure
position without a pang to my vanity. I felt that my heart stood in
need, not of praise, but of love. All the ambition of my fellows, all
their immoderate vanities, their thirst for power, their needs of
luxury, their continual hunger for notoriety,--what did all these matter
to me? I could not be amused with toys like these. I was myself only a
poor, single-hearted man, enamored of an ideal,--an ingenuous child, if
you will, seeking love and feeling it alive within him long before
meeting her who was to develop its power. I kept silence, knowing I
should have to bear raillery,--a thing indifferent, as far as I am
concerned personally, but one which would have pained me as an outrage
to my inmost, sacred religion. Once, only once in my life,--I should
like to tell you this, Caroline,--I have loved--"
"Don't tell me!" cried she, "I don't want to know."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account