Left like Florimel an orphan, but at a yet earlier age, she had been
brought up with a care that had gone over into severity, against which
her nature had revolted with an energy that gathered strength from her
own repression of its signs; and when she came of age, and took things
into her own hands, she carried herself in its eyes so oddly, yet with
such sweetness and dignity and consistency in her oddest extravagances,
that society honoured her even when it laughed at her, loved her,
listened to her, applauded, approved--did everything except imitate
her--which indeed was just as well, for else confusion would have
been worse confounded. She was always rushing to defence--with money,
with indignation, with refuge. It would look like a caricature did I
record the number of charities to which she belonged, and the various
societies which, in the exuberance of her passionate benevolence, she
had projected and of necessity abandoned. Yet still the fire burned,
for her changes were from no changeableness: through them all the
fundamental operation of her character remained the same. The case was
that, for all her headlong passion for deliverance, she could not help
discovering now and then, through an occasional self-assertion of that
real good sense which her rampant and unsubjected benevolence could but
overlay, not finally smother, that she was either doing nothing at all,
or more evil than good.
The lack of discipline in her goodness came out in this, at times
amusingly, that she would always at first side with the lower or weaker
or worse. If a dog had torn a child, and was going to be killed in
consequence, she would not only intercede for the dog, but absolutely
side with him, mentioning this and that provocation which the naughty
child must have given him ere he could have been goaded to the deed.
Once when the schoolmaster in her village was going to cane a boy
for cruelty to a cripple, she pleaded for his pardon on the ground
that it was worse to be cruel than to be a cripple, and therefore
more to be pitied. Everything painful was to her cruel, and softness
and indulgence, moral honey and sugar and nuts to all alike, was the
panacea for human ills. She could not understand that infliction might
be loving kindness. On one occasion when a boy was caught in the act of
picking her pocket, she told the policeman he was doing nothing of the
sort--he was only searching for a lozenge for his terrible cough; and
in proof of her asserted conviction, she carried him home with her, but
lost him before morning, as well as the spoon with which he had eaten
his gruel.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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