But whatever the nature of Malcolm’s influence upon Lady Clementina,
she resented it, thinking towards and speaking to him repellently.
Something in her did not like him. She knew he did not approve of her,
and she did not like being disapproved of. Neither did she approve of
him. He was pedantic--and far too good for an honest and brave youth:
not that she could say she had seen dishonesty or cowardice in him,
or that she could have told which vice she would prefer to season his
goodness withal, and bring him to the level of her ideal. And then,
for all her theories of equality, he was a groom--therefore to a lady
ought to be repulsive--at least when she found him intruding into the
chambers of her thoughts --personally intruding--yes, and met there
by some traitorous feelings whose behaviour she could not understand.
She resented it all, and felt towards Malcolm as if he were guilty of
forcing himself into the sacred presence of her bosom’s queen--whereas
it was his angel that did so, his Idea, over which he had no control.
Clementina would have turned that Idea out, and when she found she
could not, her soul started up wrathful, in maidenly disgust with her
heart, and cast resentment upon everything in him whereon it would
hang. She had not yet, however, come to ask herself any questions; she
had only begun to fear that a woman to whom a person from the stables
could be interesting, even in the form of an unexplained riddle,
must be herself a person of low tastes; and that, for all her pride
in coming of honest people, there must be a drop of bad blood in her
somewhere.
For a time her eyes had been fixed on her work, and there had been
silence in the little group.
“My lady!” said Malcolm, and drew a step nearer to Clementina.
She looked up. How lovely she was with the trouble in her eyes! Thought
Malcolm, “If only she were what she might be! If the form were but
filled with the spirit! the body with life!”
“My lady!” he repeated, just a little embarrassed, “I should like
to tell you one thing that came to me only lately--came to me when
thinking over the hard words you spoke to me that day in the park. But
it is something so awful that I dare not speak of it except you will
make your heart solemn to hear it.”
He stopped, with his eyes questioning hers. Clementina’s first thought
once more was madness, but as she steadily returned his look, her face
grew pale, and she gently bowed her head in consent.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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