"You see, John," said Mrs. Dennistoun, "Elinor knows that the right
is on her side: but she will consent to say nothing about it to any
one--to give herself out as the offender rather--that is to say, as an
ill-disciplined person that cannot put up with anything, as you seem to
have said."
John laughed with vexation, yet a kind of amusement. "I never said it
nor thought it: still if it pleases her to think so---- The wiser thing
if this separation is final----"
"If it is final!" Elinor cried. She raised herself up again in her
chair, and contemplated the unfortunate John with a sort of tragic
superiority. "Do you think that of me," she said, "that I would take
such a step as this and that it should not be final? Is dying final?
Could one do such a thing as this and change?"
"Such things have been done," said John. "Elinor, forgive me. I must say
it--it is all your life that is in the balance, and another life. There
is this infant to be struggled over, perhaps rent in two by those who
should have united to take care of him--and it's a boy, I hear. There's
his name and his after-life to think of--a child without a father,
perhaps the heir of a family to which he will not belong. Elinor--tell
her, aunt, you understand: is it my wish to hand her back to--to---- No,
I'll speak no names. But you know I disliked it always, opposed it always.
It is not out of any favour to--to the other side. But she ought to take
all these things into account. Her own position, and the position in the
future of the child----"
Elinor had crushed her fan with her hands, and Mrs. Dennistoun let the
knitting with which she had gone on in spite of all fall at last in her
lap. There was a little pause. John Tatham's voice itself had began to
falter, or rather swelled in sound as when a stream swells in flood.
"I do not go into the question about women and what they ought to put up
with," said John, resuming. "There's many things that law can do nothing
for--and nature in many ways makes it harder for women, I acknowledge.
We cannot change that. Think what her position will be--neither a wife
nor with the freedom of a widow; and the boy, bearing the name of one he
must almost be taught to think badly of--for one of them must be in the
wrong----"
"He shall never, never hear that name; he shall know nothing, he shall
be free of every bond; his mind shall never be cramped or twisted or
troubled by any--man--if I live."
This Elinor said, lifting her pale face from her hands with eyes that
flashed and shone with a blaze of excitement and weakness.
"There already," said John, "is a tremendous condition--if you live! Who
can make sure that they will live? We must all die--some sooner, some
later--and you wearing yourself out with excitement, that never were
strong; you exposing your heart, the weakest organ----"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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