evenings when they were not going out, but these were few. As for
Philip, he never dined at home. When he had no engagements he dined at
his club, leaving Elinor with her mother. He gave Mrs. Dennistoun very
little of his company, and when they did meet there was in his manner
too a sort of reflection of the superciliousness of the “smart”
visitors and the “smart” servant. She was to him, too, in some degree
the landlady, the old lady down-stairs. Elinor, as was natural,
redoubled her demonstrations of affection, her excuses and sweet words
to make up for this neglect: but all the time there was in her mother’s
mind that dreadful doubt which assails us when we have committed
ourselves to one act or another, “Was it wise? Would it not have been
better to have denied herself and stayed away?” So far as self-denial
went, it was more exercised in Curzon Street than it would have been at
the Cottage. For she had to see many things that displeased her and to
say no word; to guess at the tears, carefully washed away from Elinor’s
eyes, and to ask no questions, and to see what she could not but feel
was the violent career downward, the rush that must lead to a
catastrophe, but make no sign. There was one evening when Elinor, not
looking well or feeling well, had stayed at home, Philip having a whole
long list of engagements in hand; men’s engagements, his wife explained,
a stockbroking dinner, an adjournment to somebody’s chambers, a
prolonged sitting, which meant play, and a great deal of wine, and other
attendant circumstances into which she did not enter. Elinor had no
engagement for that night, and was free to be petted and fêted by her
mother. She was put at her ease in a soft and rich dressing-gown, and
the prettiest little dinner served, and the room filled with flowers,
and everything done that used to be done when she was recovering from
some little mock illness, some child’s malady, just enough to show how
dear above everything was the child to the mother, and with what tender
ingenuity the mother could invent new delights for the child. These
delights, alas! did not transport Elinor now as they once had done, and
yet the repose was sweet, and the comfort of this nearest and dearest
friend to lean upon something more than words could say.
On this evening, however, in the quiet of those still hours, poor
Elinor’s heart was opened, or rather her mouth, which on most occasions
was closed so firmly. She said suddenly, in the midst of something quite
different, “Oh, I wish Phil was not so much engaged with those dreadful
city men.”
“My dear!” said Mrs. Dennistoun, who was thinking of far other things;
and then she said, “there surely cannot be much to fear in that respect.
He is never in the city--he is never up, my dear, when the city men are
doing their work.”
“Ah,” said Elinor, “I don’t think that matters; he is in with them all
the same.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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