The Martins Of Cro' Martin, Vol. I (of II)Lever, Charles
History
The Martins Of Cro' Martin, Vol. I (of II)
Lever, Charles
Ireland -- History -- 1800-1837 -- Fiction; Ireland -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
And Mary motioned with her hand that he should withdraw. Scarcely was
the door closed behind him than she burst into a torrent of tears; her
long pent-up agony utterly overpowered her, and she cried with all the
vehemence of a child's grief. Her heart once opened to sorrow, by a
hundred channels came tributaries to her affliction. Up to that moment
her uncle's departure had never seemed a cruelty; now it took all the
form of desertion. The bitterness of her forlorn condition had never
struck her till it came associated with all the sorrows of others. It is
not impossible that wounded self-love entered into her feelings. It is
by no means unlikely that the sense of her own impaired importance added
poignancy to her misery. Who shall anatomize motives, or who shall be
skilful enough to trace the springs of one human emotion? There was
assuredly enough outside of and above all personal consideration to
ennoble her grief and dignify her affliction.
Her first impulses led her to regard herself as utterly useless; her
occupation gone, and her whole career of duty annihilated. A second and
a better resolve whispered to her that she was more than ever needful to
those who without her would be left without a friend. “If I desert them,
who is to remain?” asked she. “It is true I am no more able to set
in motion the schemes by which their indigence was alleviated. I am
powerless, but not all worthless. I can still be their nurse, their
comforter, their schoolmistress. My very example may teach them how
altered fortune can be borne with fortitude and patience. They shall see
me reduced to a thousand privations, and perhaps even this may bear
its lesson.” Drying her tears, she began to feel within her some of the
courage she hoped to inspire in others; and anxious not to let old Catty
detect the trace of sorrow in her features, issued forth into the wood
for a walk.
As the deep shadows thickened around her, she grew calmer and more
meditative. The solemn stillness of the place, the deep, unbroken
quietude, imparted its own soothing influence to her thoughts; and as
she went, her heart beat freer, and her elastic temperament again arose
to cheer and sustain her. To confront the future boldly and well, it was
necessary that she should utterly forget the past. She could no longer
play the great part to which wealth and high station had raised her;
she must now descend to that humbler one,--all whose influence should
be derived from acts of kindness and words of comfort, unaided by the
greater benefits she had once dispensed.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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