“So the die was cast and I became a wife instead of the mere shadow of
one. You were prosperous, and not a sorrow came to disturb my sense of
complete security till that day two weeks ago, when, looking up in my
own library, I saw, gleaming between me and the evening lamp, a face,
which, different as it was in many respects, tore my dead past out of
the grave and sent my thoughts reeling back to a lonely road on a black
hillside with a lighted window in view, and behind that window the
outstretched form of a man with his head among leaves not redder than
his blood.
“I have said to you, I have said to others, that a specter rose upon me
that day in the library. It was such to me,--an apparition and nothing
else. Perhaps he meant to impress himself as such, for I had heard no
footfall and only looked up because of the constraining force of the
look which awaited me. I knew afterward that it was a man whom I had
seen, a man whom you yourself had introduced into the house; but at the
instant I thought it a phantom of my forgotten past sent to shock and
destroy me; and, struck speechless with the horror of it, I lost
that opportunity of mutual explanation which might have saved me an
unnecessary and cruel experience. For this man, who recognized me more
surely than I did him, who perhaps knew who I was before he ever entered
my house, has sported for two weeks with my fears and hopes as a tiger
with his prey. Maintaining his attitude of stranger--you have been
witness to his manner in my presence--he led me slowly but surely to
believe myself deceived by an extraordinary resemblance; a resemblance,
moreover, which did not hold at all times, and which frequently vanished
altogether, as I recalled the straight-featured but often uncouth aspect
of the man who had awakened the admiration of Boone. Memory had been
awakened and my sleep filled with dreams, but the unendurable had been
spared me and I was thanking God with my whole heart, when suddenly one
night, when an evening spent with friends in the old way had made me
feel safe, my love safe, my husband and my child safe, there came to my
ears from below the sound of a laugh, loud, coarse and deriding,--such
a laugh as could spring from no member of my own household, such a laugh
as I heard but once before and that in the by-gone years when some one
asked Mr. Brainard if he meant to live always in Boone. The shock was
terrible, and when I learned that the secretary, and the secretary only,
was below, I knew who that secretary was and yielded to the blow.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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