Our sins are stronger than we are _in their power to fasten on us a
sense of guilt that we cannot shake off_. Sinful pleasures lure us
only in _anticipation_, dancing before us like Salome before her
uncle, quite irresistible in fascination. Happiness seems altogether
to depend upon an evil deed. But on the day that deed, long held in
alluring expectation, is actually done--how swift and terrible the
alteration in its aspect! It passes from anticipation, through
committal, into memory, and it never will be beautiful again. We lock
it in remembrance, as in the bloody room of Bluebeard's palace, where
the dead things hung; at the thought of it we shrink and yet to it our
reminiscence continually is drawn. Something happens in us as
automatic as the dropping of a loosened apple from a tree; all the
laws of the moral universe conspire to further it and we have no power
to prevent: sin becomes guilt. When on a lonely ocean the floating
bell-buoys toll, no human hands cause them to ring; the waste of an
unpeopled ocean surrounds them everyway. The sea by its own
restlessness is ringing its own bells. So tolls remorse in a man's
heart and no man can stop it.
Our sins are stronger than we are _in their power to become habitual_.
If one who steps from an upper window had only the single act to
consider, his problem would be simple. He could step or not as he
chose. But when one steps from an upper window he finds himself
dealing with a power over which his will has no control. Master of his
single act, he is not master of the _gravitation_ that succeeds it.
Many a youth blithely plays with sin, supposing that separate
deeds--which he may do or refrain from as he will--make up the
problem. Soon or late he finds that he is dealing with moral laws,
built into the structure of the universe as gravitation is--laws
which he did not create and whose operation he cannot control. By them
with terrific certainty thoughts grow to deeds, deeds to habits,
habits to character, character to destiny.
At the beginning sin always comes disguised as liberty. Its lure is
the seductive freedom which it promises from the trammels of
conscience and the authority of law. But every man who ever yet
accepted sin's offer of a free, unfettered life, discovered the cheat.
Free to do the evil thing, to indulge the baser moods--so men begin,
but they end _not free to stop_, bound as slaves to the thing
that they were free to do. They have been at liberty to play with a
cuttle-fish, and now that the first long arm with its suckers grasps
them, and the second arm is waving near, they are not at liberty to
get away.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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