"MY DEAR AUNT,--I hope you are well, as this leaves me at present. Excuse this bad writing as I am so very bad, and my head aches fit to split, but I am ordered this very moment, before the post goes out, to acquaint you with my accident, as Monsieur Codroie says, perhaps, you may wish me to come to town, to have the rest of my teeth put to rights, the fact is then, to be short, dear Aunt, I was running just now, and I hit my face against another boy's head, and broke out my two front teeth, "Your affectionate Niece, "GEORGE WOODCOCK. "P.S.--Pray deliver the enclosed to William, in answer to a long stupid sermon he has written to me about five shillings he says I borrowed of him." George's enclosure was merely poor William's laboured epistle turned inside out, with these eloquent words written near the seal,-- "Five and four makes nine, Mind your business, and I'll mind mine." "_Vive la poésie!_" said I, throwing the letter aside, and ringing for my _femme de chambre_, whom I desired to prepare for my journey to _The Cock_ at Sutton on the following morning. I did not awake till twelve o'clock, when I rang my bell. "Madame, _la voiture est à la porte_," said my French maid, as she entered my bedroom. "I cannot help it; so bring me a cup of chocolate, _pour me donner du courage_," I replied. Before I had finished it, the Duke of Leinster was announced, and I went down to him in my dressing-gown and slippers. "Upon my honour," said His Grace, "I am very glad you did not keep your appointment with Fred Lamb. I have brought little George some strings to mend his fiddle with and, if you will give it me, I will string it for him." I rang for the fiddle, and Leinster set to work in great glee. "How did you get home last night?" I asked. "Oh," said Leinster, "my brother Fitzgerald has found out such a woman! Upon my honour I never laughed so much in all my life. He told me she was Venus herself, just emerged from the froth of the sea! I wanted to go home and think of you; but Fitzgerald dragged me by force to No. 2 Upper Norton-street. We were shown into a parlour by an old, dirty duenna, who assured us her mistress was engaged, and she regretted it of all things. "'Good gracious!' said I, 'Fitz, you are not going to wait?' "'Yes,' said my brother, mysteriously; 'she is in keeping, and has been these five years. I shall ruin her if I am found here, so pray be quiet. The gentleman who keeps her is a captain of horse-marines.'