This was Janet’s programme of the strange romance. Isabel, though she
was not used to contrasts of this description, went down the hill in a
maze of reflections, wondering over the difference. Ailie’s tragic
purpose of going forth into the world to save it, her first step being
upon her own heart, and all its maiden hopes; and her mother’s
frightful, sceptical, middle-aged prescience of the effects of weariness
and failure--the inevitable disappointment, the sickening of heart, the
giving up of hope, the despairing flight homeward to seek peace at least
and quietness--stood before her side by side like two pictures. Would
the two enthusiasts content themselves with common life and comfort
after their high dreams, or was there, after all, nothing in the dreams
for which Ailie was making so awful a sacrifice? Isabel was too
inexperienced to come to light on the subject; but Janet Macfarlane’s
cheerful unbelief struck her with mingled horror and pain. She did not
ask herself whether all that was beautiful and wonderful in the hopes
and beliefs of beginning life was thus looked upon by the calm eyes of
the elders as so much delusion to be dispersed by the winds and storms.
But that suggestion of insecurity, unreality--and of the better-informed
spectator, who realised and knew the downfall that was coming--appalled
and terrified her. The sight of Mr. Lothian, who came out from the
Mansegate as she passed, was, perhaps for the first time, a relief to
Isabel. She was glad to have him come to her, to hear his sympathetic
voice, to feel that there were people in the world who were not
sceptical. ‘I have been seeing Ailie,’ she said, accounting
half-apologetically for the little shiver of nervous excitement which
she could not restrain.
‘And now you’ll come and see Miss Catherine,’ said Mr. Lothian. ‘You
cannot help the one, but you can help the other, Isabel.’
‘Me help Miss Catherine? No, Mr. Lothian,’ said Isabel, with a little
air of dignity. ‘She is never pleased, whatever I do. She would like me
to pretend to be somebody else, and not myself.’
‘And I am so foolish,’ said the minister, with a smile, ‘as to like
yourself best of all; and so does she, Isabel, if you saw her heart.
You’ll come and see her with me.’
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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