Then she went silently home, holding Stapylton’s letter in her hand. She
did not put it even in her pocket as a thing belonging to her; but held
it, wetted by the burn, listlessly in her hand. Yet she put it back once
more into the locked drawer. It was one of her possessions still, no
more to be parted with than any other legacy of her past life. It was
still afternoon, and the broad bright summer sunshine lay over the Loch.
Isabel sat down at her parlour window, listless and alone. She was tired
with her walk, and had ‘no object,’ as her stepmother said, in going out
again. She could not now wander about the braes as she had once done.
There was a heap of work lying on the table, domestic mending and
making, chiefly for herself; but she could not sit down to that silent
occupation at a moment when all the wheels of life were standing still,
with an expectant jar and thrill, to await the least movement of her
finger. She took a book at first; but her own thoughts and her own
situation were more interesting than any book. Then she gazed out,
without well knowing what she saw--but by degrees, her perceptions
quickening, became aware that Miss Catherine’s boat, with its bright
cushions, was gliding out from the beach opposite Lochhead. It was a
boat which could be identified at once from all the coarser forms on the
Loch. There were ladies in it--young ladies, as Isabel felt. The boat
stood out shining on the silvery sunshiny water, with its shadow as
vivid below as was the substance above. That was how life went for the
others--a life within Isabel’s reach, so near that she could touch it
with her finger. It seemed to her that she could hear their voices and
laughter while she sat alone. They were going up Tam-na-hara, the
highest hill on Loch Diarmid, to judge by the direction they were
taking--a merry party, with the sunshine flooding all round them and
their joyful way.
When the boat disappeared, Isabel took up some of the work that lay on
her table. Had it even been work for the children there might have been
some sort of consolation in it; but it was for herself. She seemed to be
shut up in a little round all circling in herself--the grey walls her
only surroundings--this homely household her only sphere. At six Jean
came to the door and called her to tea. The children were seated at
their porridge, Margaret’s chair had been carefully put out of the way,
and Isabel sat down on her stepmother’s other side, to the curious
composite meal. She was not disposed to listen, but Jean was as little
disposed to be silent.
‘Mary’s been complaining of her head,’ she said; ‘I think I’ll no send
her to the school the morn; maybe you would give her a bit lesson,
Isabel, out of one of your books, as you used to do. There’s measles
about the Loch. I dinna like to expose her at the school.’
‘Very well--if she likes,’ said Isabel.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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