‘Oh, Miss Catherine, you are hard--hard!’ cried Isabel. ‘If he was your
friend, he was my husband, and knew all, and would never, never have
judged me like this!’
‘Isabel Diarmid,’ said Miss Catherine, sternly, ‘it’s little more than a
year since he was brought home to his house to die, and for a time I
thought it was your death-blow too; and now, with your baby in your
arms, you are going to wed another man. You should not speak of harsh
judgment to me.’
‘But I must,’ said poor Isabel. ‘Oh, Miss Catherine, if you would but
think how it all was. Can I put it in words? I was fond--fond of
him--and oh! but he was good to me. But you know--the difference; and if
you had said a month since--_He_ is coming; let us fly away, not to
meet him, not to bring back the past--I would have gone to the end of
the world. I would be--almost--glad--now----’
‘Of what, Isabel?’ cried Miss Catherine. ‘My dear, my dear, come, and I
will go with you, and free you from this man!’
‘I can never be free of him--now!’ she said. ‘To say the words is an
offence to me. I would have clung to my old life, to be Mr. Lothian’s
widow and little Margaret’s mother, and nothing more; but now that is
all past. If that was what you wanted, why did you let me see the one
man--the only man----’
Here Isabel stopped, silenced by her sobs and her shame. She was not
ashamed to love him, but she was ashamed to say it in words, to disclose
the sacred depths of the heart to any strange eye. She bent her crimson
tear-wet face over her child. Poor little Margaret! if she could have
known the meaning of all those looks of trouble, and passion, and
distress, at which she gazed so gravely with profound baby eyes! Miss
Catherine rose up and shook out her dress with an agitated movement, as
if shaking the very dust from it, according to scriptural injunction;
and yet she had been touched, though she would not admit it, by Isabel’s
cry.
‘You must judge for yourself,’ she said. ‘All has been said that can be
said. I cannot change your heart or settle your life for you, one way or
another. You must do as you will. You know what I think, and what a sore
blow this is to me; and I can say no more.’
And Miss Catherine swept out of the room and out of the house, leaving
poor Isabel with her face hidden and her heart torn asunder.
It did not even strike Isabel as strange that she received no overtures
of friendship from his family, nor, indeed, heard of them in any way.
Her case seemed too far removed out of the ordinary course of life to
leave her any interest in ordinary circumstances. She never thought of
his people; all who surrounded herself were hostile or disapproving, and
the effect upon her was to make her independent (as she thought) of
sympathy. The world was hard upon her, and she turned her back upon the
world.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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