‘My lamb!’ said Jean, furtively smoothing the girl’s soft hair. It was
seldom she ventured on such a proof of sympathy, for Isabel was proud.
But she did not sit down; she stood with some agitation, twisting the
table-cover from the table, shifting from one foot to another. At last
her burden came forth with a burst. ‘It’s best I should ken; it’s a’
yours now, Isabel; and you were never that fond of me and the poor
bairns. I’m your father’s wife, and I’m no a lady born like you; but I’m
one that would never thole to be where she wasna wanted. Whisht!
whisht; I’m no misdoubting your kindness; for her sake I ken you would
aye be kind; but if there was to be a change I would like best it should
be now.’
‘Why should there be a change?’ said Isabel, weeping. ‘Oh, is there not
change enough to please you? Would you like me to stay my lane in this
still house and die? But I could not die--I would go wild; and, maybe,
you would not care.’
‘As if I didna care for everything belonging to ye!’ cried Jean, once
more timidly caressing her stepdaughter’s bent head. ‘If it was only
_that_, I would be content to be your servant--as near your servant as
would be becoming to the Captain’s widow,’ she added, after a momentary
pause. ‘But your heart’s touched and tender the noo; and if, after, you
should reflect on me for taking advantage of you, or anybody else should
reflect----’
‘Who is there that has any right’ cried hasty Isabel, drying her tears
with hot and trembling hand. ‘There’s but me now in all the world, and
no one that can bid me go or come, or do this or that. Ah, me!’
‘It’s a grand thing to be free,’ said Jean, her voice faltering a
little; ‘free o’ them you’re bound to by any bonds but what God has
made. When it’s nature it’s different--or when it’s your free choice
it’s different; but you and me, Isabel, are free to meet and free to
part. I’m no saying but what it would be a sore heartbreak; but if ever
there was to come a time when you would reflect----’
‘Oh, dinna speak,’ said Isabel; ‘if it’s your will to leave me, go, and
let me take my chance. If I was to go out of my senses or die on the
hill-side, what is that to other folk? There is none to care if I was
mad or dead to-morrow. If you speak because you’re wearied of me and my
silly ways----’
‘Oh, Isabel, my lamb!’ cried Jean, with tears, ‘I’m saying I would be
your servant if that was a’. But you maun tell me your will plain if
we’re to go or stay. A’s yours. If we live here, the bairns and me, it’s
upon you; and that I canna do unless you say plain out--Bide; and let
things be as they have aye been.’
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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