The Miracles of Antichrist: A NovelLagerlöf, Selma
General
The Miracles of Antichrist: A Novel
Lagerlöf, Selma
Sicily (Italy) -- Fiction; Socialism -- Fiction
“Yes, of course I forgive you,” said Donna Elisa.
They talked in that way for a long time without understanding each other;
but it was good for old Donna Elisa to have some one that night to put to
bed, comforted and dosed with strengthening herbs and drops. It was good
for her to still have some one to come and lay her head on her shoulder
and cry away her grief.
* * * * *
Donna Micaela, who had loved Gaetano for nearly three years without a
thought that they could ever belong to each other, had accustomed herself
to a strange kind of love. It was enough for her to know that Gaetano
loved her. When she thought of it, a tender feeling of security and
happiness stole through her. “What does it matter; what does it matter?”
she said, when she suffered adversity. “Gaetano loves me.” He was always
with her, cheering and comforting her. He took part in all her thoughts
and undertakings. He was the soul of her life.
As soon as Donna Micaela could get his address, she wrote to him. She
acknowledged to him that she had firmly believed that he had gone to
misfortune. But she had been so much afraid of what he proposed to
accomplish in the world that she had not dared to save him.
She also wrote how she detested his teachings. She did not dissemble at
all to him. She said that even if he were free she could not be his.
She feared him. He had such power over her that, if they were united, he
would make her a socialist and an atheist. Therefore she must always live
apart from him, for the salvation of her soul.
But she begged and prayed that in spite of everything he would not cease
to love her. He must not; he must not! He might punish her in any way he
pleased, if only he did not cease to love her.
He must not do as her father had. He had perhaps reason to close his
heart to her now, but he must not. He must be merciful.
If he knew how she loved him! If he knew how she dreamed of him!
She told him that he was nothing less than life itself to her.
“Must I die, Gaetano?” she asked.
“Is it not enough that those opinions and teachings part us? Is it not
enough that they have carried you to prison? Will you also cease to love
me, because we do not think alike?
“Ah, Gaetano, love me! It leads to nothing; there is no hope in your
love, but love me; I die if you do not love me.”
Donna Micaela had hardly sent off the letter before she began to wait for
the answer. She expected a stormy and angry reply, but she hoped that
there would be one single word to show her that he still loved her.
But she waited several weeks without receiving any letter from Gaetano.
It did not help her to stand and wait every morning for the
letter-carrier out on the gallery, and almost break his heart because he
was always obliged to say that he did not have anything for her.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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