Chinese -- England -- Fiction; England -- Fiction; Epistolary fiction; Humorous stories
There is a written jest among another barbarian nation that these among
whom I am tarrying, being by nature a people who take their pleasures
tragically, when they rise in the morning say, one to another, “Come,
behold; it is raining again as usual; let us go out and kill somebody.”
Undoubtedly the pointed end of this adroit-witted saying may be found
in the circumstance that it is, indeed, as the proverb aptly claims,
raining on practically every occasion in life; while, to complete the
comparison, for many dynasties past this nation has been successfully
engaged in killing people (in order to promote their ultimate benefit
through a momentary inconvenience,) in every part of the world. Thus
the lines of parallel thought maintain a harmonious balance beyond the
general analogy of their sayings; but beneath this may be found an even
subtler edge, for in order to inure themselves to the requirement of a
high destiny their various games and manners of disportment are, with a
set purpose, so rigorously contested that in their progress most of the
weak and inefficient are opportunely exterminated.
There is a favourite and well-attended display wherein two opposing
bands, each clad in robes of a distinctive colour, stand in extended
lines of mutual defiance, and at a signal impetuously engage. The
design of each is by force or guile to draw their opponents into an
unfavourable position before an arch of upright posts, and then surging
irresistibly forward, to carry them beyond the limit and hurl them to
the ground. Those who successfully inflict this humiliation upon their
adversaries until they are incapable of further resistance are hailed
victorious, and sinking into a graceful attitude receive each a golden
cup from the magnanimous hands of a maiden chose to the service, either
on account of her peerless outline, the dignified position of her House,
or (should these incentives be obviously wanting,) because the chief
ones of her family are in the habit of contributing unstintingly to the
equipment of the triumphal band. There is also another kind of strife,
differing in its essentials only so far that all who engage therein are
provided with a curved staff, with which they may dexterously draw their
antagonists beyond the limits, or, should they fail to defend themselves
adequately, break the smaller bones of their ankles. But this form of
encounter, despite the use of these weapons, is really less fatal
than the other, for it is not a permissible act to club an antagonist
resentfully about the head with the staff, nor yet even to thrust
it rigidly against his middle body. From this moderation the public
countenance extended to the curved-pole game is contemptibly meagre when
viewed by the side of the overwhelming multitudes which pour along every
channel in order to witness a more than usually desperate trial of the
hurl-headlong variety (the sight, indeed, being as attractive to these
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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