East India Company -- Fiction; Historical fiction; India -- History -- 1526-1765 -- Fiction
"Why not? It's true. Before you can create music, you have to teach
both your body and your heart. It's the same with making love."
"What do you mean?"
She reached and touched his thigh. "When we're very young, lovemaking
is mostly just desire. We may think it's more, but it isn't really.
Then gradually we learn more of its ways, how to give and receive. But
even then we still don't fully understand its deeper significance.
We're like a novice who has learned the techniques of the sitar, the
way to strike and pull a string to make one note blend into another,
but who still doesn't comprehend the spiritual depth of a raga. Its
power to move our heart. We still don't understand that its meaning and
feeling can only come from within. And love, like a raga, is an
expression of reverence and of wonder. Wonder at what we are and can
be. So even after all the techniques are mastered, we still must learn
to experience this wonder, this sense of our spirit becoming one with
the other. Otherwise it's somehow still empty. Like perfect music that
has no feeling, no life."
He was silent for a moment, trying to comprehend what she was saying.
"If you look at it like that, I suppose you could be right."
"With music, we first have to learn its language, then learn to open
our spirit. Lovemaking is just the same."
She nestled her head against his chest, sending her warmth through him.
As he held her, he noticed lying alongside the pool the garland of
flowers she had worn the night before. He reached and took it and
slipped it over her head. Then he kissed her gently, finding he was
indeed filled with wonder at the feeling he had for her.
He held her silently for a time, looking at the paintings on the walls
of the palace around them. Then he noticed a large straw basket at the
entryway.
"What is that?" He pointed.
She rose and looked. "I think it's something Samad had left for us."
She lifted herself out of the water and, holding her wrap against her,
brought the basket. It was filled with fruits and melons.
"They're not from Samarkand or Kabul, like you've probably grown
accustomed to at the palace in Agra. But I think you'll like them
anyway." She squinted across the square, in the direction of the
mosque. "I love Samad dearly. He did all of this for me. But he refuses
to listen to anything I say." She handed him an apple, then reached and
took some grapes. "You know, I think he secretly wants to die a martyr.
Like a lover eager to die for his or her beloved. He wants to die for
his wild freedom, for what he thinks is beautiful. Perhaps to be
remembered as one who never bowed to anyone. I wish I had his
strength."
"Where's he now?"
"You won't see him any more. But he's still here. He'll have food sent
to us. He loves me like a daughter, and he's happy when I am. And he
knows now you make me happy. But you mustn't see him here again, even
know that he's here. It would be too dangerous for you. Perhaps
someday, if we're all still alive."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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