I filled a glass with St. Galmier, and gave it to him to drink. I held
it to his mouth as though he were a child. He gulped down a mouthful,
and some of it was spilt on his shirt-front.
“Who’s killed herself?”
I do not know why I asked, for I knew whom he meant. He made an effort
to collect himself.
“They had a row last night. He went away.”
“Is she dead?”
“No; they’ve taken her to the hospital.”
“Then what are you talking about?” I cried impatiently. “Why did you
say she’d killed herself?”
“Don’t be cross with me. I can’t tell you anything if you talk to me
like that.”
I clenched my hands, seeking to control my irritation. I attempted a
smile.
“I’m sorry. Take your time. Don’t hurry, there’s a good fellow.”
His round blue eyes behind the spectacles were ghastly with terror. The
magnifying-glasses he wore distorted them.
“When the concierge went up this morning to take a letter she could get
no answer to her ring. She heard someone groaning. The door wasn’t
locked, and she went in. Blanche was lying on the bed. She’d been
frightfully sick. There was a bottle of oxalic acid on the table.”
Stroeve hid his face in his hands and swayed backwards and forwards,
groaning.
“Was she conscious?”
“Yes. Oh, if you knew how she’s suffering! I can’t bear it. I can’t
bear it.”
His voice rose to a shriek.
“Damn it all, you haven’t got to bear it,” I cried impatiently. “She’s
got to bear it.”
“How can you be so cruel?”
“What have you done?”
“They sent for a doctor and for me, and they told the police. I’d given
the concierge twenty francs, and told her to send for me if anything
happened.”
He paused a minute, and I saw that what he had to tell me was very hard
to say.
“When I went she wouldn’t speak to me. She told them to send me away. I
swore that I forgave her everything, but she wouldn’t listen. She tried
to beat her head against the wall. The doctor told me that I mustn’t
remain with her. She kept on saying, ‘Send him away!’ I went, and
waited in the studio. And when the ambulance came and they put her on a
stretcher, they made me go in the kitchen so that she shouldn’t know I
was there.”
While I dressed—for Stroeve wished me to go at once with him to the
hospital—he told me that he had arranged for his wife to have a private
room, so that she might at least be spared the sordid promiscuity of a
ward. On our way he explained to me why he desired my presence; if she
still refused to see him, perhaps she would see me. He begged me to
repeat to her that he loved her still; he would reproach her for
nothing, but desired only to help her; he made no claim on her, and on
her recovery would not seek to induce her to return to him; she would
be perfectly free.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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