"No, no," she answered. "You can't do that, Roger. You can't."
His face whitened. Then, with his piercing eyes bent on her as though
to read her inmost thoughts, he asked:
"What do you mean? Is there--anyone else?"
"Yes." The answer came very low.
"And you care for him?"
She nodded.
"But we can never be anything to each other," she said, still in that
same low, emotionless voice.
"Then--then--you'd grow to care--"
"No. I shall never care for anyone else again. That love has burnt up
everything--like a fire." She paused. "You don't want to marry--an
empty grate, do you?" she asked, with a sudden desperate little laugh.
Roger's arm drew her closer.
"Yes, I do. And I'll light another fire there and by its warmth we'll
make our home together. I won't ask much, Nan dear--only to be allowed
to love you and make you happy. And in time--in time, I'll teach you
to love me in return and to forget the past. Only say yes, sweetheart!
I'll keep you so safe--so safe!"
What magic is it teaches men how to answer the women they love--endows
them with a quickness of perception denied them till the flame of love
flares up within them, and doubly denied them should that flame burn
low behind the bars of matrimony? Surely it must be some cunning wile
of old Dame Nature's--whose chief concern is, after all, the
continuation of the species. She it is who knows how to deck the
peacock in fine feathers to the undoing of the plain little peahen, to
crown the stag with the antlers of magnificence so that the doe's
velvet eyes melt in adoration. And shall not the same wise old Dame
know how to add a glamour to the sons of men when one of them goes
forth to seek his mate?
Had Roger been just his normal self that afternoon--his matter-of-fact,
imperceptive self--he would never have known how to answer Nan's
half-desperate question, and the rose-garden might have witnessed a
different ending to the scene. But Mother Mature was fighting on the
side of this man-child of hers, whispering her age-old wisdom into his
ears, and the tender comprehension of his answer fell like balm on
Nan's sore heart.
"I'll keep you safe!"
It was safety she craved most of all--the safety of some stronger
barrier betwixt herself and Peter. Once she were Roger's wife she knew
she would be well-guarded. The barrier would be too high for her to
climb, even though Peter called to her from the other side.
A momentary terror of giving up her freedom assailed her, and for an
instant she wavered. Then she remembered her bargain with Fate--and
if, finally, Roger were willing to take her when he knew everything,
she would marry him.
Her hand crept out and slid into his big palm.
"Very well, Roger," she said quietly. "If--knowing everything--you
still want me . . . I'll marry you."
And as his arms closed round her, crushing her in his embrace, she
seemed to hear a distant sound like the closing of a door--the door of
the forbidden might-have-been.
CHAPTER XIII
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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