Mothers and daughters -- Fiction; New York (N.Y.) -- Fiction; Psychological fiction; Riviera (France) -- Fiction
Anne pressed her closer. “Can’t we agree, mother, that I must take my
chance--and that, if the risks are as great as you think, you’ll be
there to help me? After all, we’ve all got to buy our own experience,
haven’t we? And perhaps the point of view about ... about early
mistakes ... is more indulgent now than in your time. But I don’t want
to discuss that,” the girl hurried on. “Can’t we agree not to discuss
anything--not even Chris--and just be the perfect friends we were
before? You’d say yes if you knew the difference it has made, this last
year, to have you back!” She lifted her face close to Mrs. Clephane’s
to add, with a half-whimsical smile: “Mothers oughtn’t ever to leave
their daughters.”
Kate Clephane sat motionless in that persuasive hold. It did not seem
to her, at the moment, as if she and her child were two, but as if her
whole self had passed into the young body pressed pleadingly against
her.
“How can I leave her--how can I ever leave her?” was her only thought.
“You see,” the cajoling voice went on, “when I asked you to come back
and live with me, though I _did_ want you to, most awfully, I wasn’t as
sure ... well, as sure as Uncle Fred was ... that the experiment would
be a success--a perfect success. My life had been rather lonely, but it
had been very independent too, in spite of Granny, and I didn’t know
how well I should behave to my new mother, or whether she’d like me, or
whether we’d be happy together. And then you came, and the very first
day I forgot all my doubts--didn’t _you_?”
Kate Clephane assented: “The very first day.”
“And every day afterward, as I saw how right Uncle Fred had been, and
how perfectly he’d remembered what you were, and what you would have
been to me if we hadn’t been separated when I was a baby, I was more
and more grateful to you for coming, and more and more anxious to make
you forget that we hadn’t always been together.”
“You did make me forget it--”
“And then, suddenly, the great gulf opened again, and there I was on
one side of it, and you on the other, just as it was in all those
dreary years when I was without you; and it seemed as if it was you who
had chosen again that we should be divided, and in my unhappiness I
said dreadful things.... I know I did....”
Kate felt as if it were her own sobs that were shaking her daughter’s
body. She held her fast, saying over and over, as a mother would to a
child that has fallen and hurt itself: “There, there ... don’t cry.”
She no longer knew what she herself was feeling. All her consciousness
had passed into Anne. This young anguish, which is the hardest of all
to bear, must be allayed: she was ready to utter any words that should
lift that broken head from her breast.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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