"It's a sad history, Lecoq. I had reached an age at which a man's career
is, as they say, finished, when I suddenly lost my wife and my two sons,
my whole joy, my whole hope in this world. I found myself alone in life,
more lost than the shipwrecked man in the midst of the sea, without a
plank to sustain me. I was a soulless body, when chance brought me to
settle down at Orcival. There I saw Laurence; she was just fifteen, and
never lived there a creature who united in herself so much intelligence,
grace, innocence, and beauty. Courtois became my friend, and soon
Laurence was like a daughter to me. I doubtless loved her then, but I
did not confess it to myself, for I did not read my heart clearly. She
was so young, and I had gray hairs! I persuaded myself that my love for
her was like that of a father, and it was as a father that she cherished
me. Ah, I passed many a delicious hour listening to her gentle prattle
and her innocent confidences; I was happy when I saw her skipping about
in my garden, picking the roses I had reared for her, and laying waste
my parterres; and I said to myself that existence is a precious gift
from God. My dream then was to follow her through life. I fancied her
wedded to some good man who made her happy, while I remained the friend
of the wife, after having been the confidant of the maiden. I took good
care of my fortune, which is considerable, because I thought of her
children, and wished to hoard up treasures for them. Poor, poor
Laurence!"
M. Lecoq fidgeted in his chair, rubbed his face with his handkerchief,
and seemed ill at ease. He was really much more touched than he wished
to appear.
"One day," pursued the old man, "my friend Courtois spoke to me of her
marriage with Tremorel; then I measured the depth of my love. I felt
terrible agonies which it is impossible to describe; it was like a
long-smothered fire which suddenly breaks forth and devours everything.
To be old, and to love a child! I thought I was going crazy; I tried to
reason, to upbraid myself, but it was of no avail. What can reason or
irony do against passion? I kept silent and suffered. To crown all,
Laurence selected me as her confidant--what torture! She came to me to
talk of Hector; she admired in him all that seemed to her superior to
other men, so that none could be compared with him. She was enchanted
with his bold horseback riding, and thought everything he said sublime."
"Did you know what a wretch Tremorel was?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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