World War, 1914-1918 -- Hospitals, charities, etc.
We are ignorant of their past. But have they a future? I consider these
innocent victims in the tragic majesty of the hour, and I feel ashamed
of living and breathing freely among them.
Poor, poor brothers! What could one do for you which would not be
insufficient, unworthy, mediocre? We can at least give up everything and
devote ourselves heart and soul to our holy and exacting work.
But no! round the beds on which your solitary drama is enacted, men are
still taking part in a sinister comedy. Every kind of folly, the most
ignoble and also the most imbecile passions, pursue their enterprises
and their satisfactions over your heads.
Neither the four corpses we buried this morning, nor your daily agonies
will disarm these appetites, suspend these calculations, and destroy
these ambitions the development and fruition of which even your
martyrdom, may be made to serve.
I will spend the whole evening among my wounded, and we will talk
together, gently, of their misery; it will please them, and they will
make me forget the horrible atmosphere of discussion that reigns here.
Alas! during the outburst of the great catastrophe, seeing the volume of
blood and fire, listening to the uproar, smelling the stench of the
vast gangrene, we thought that all passions would be laid aside, like
cumbersome weapons, and that we should give ourselves up with clean
hearts and empty hands to battle against the fiery nightmare. He who
fights and defends himself needs a pure heart: so does he who wanders
among charnel houses, gives drink to parched lips, washes fevered faces
and bathes wounds. We thought there would be a great forgetfulness of
self and of former hopes, and of the whole world. O Union of pure hearts
to meet the ordeal!
But no! The first explosion was tremendous, yet hardly had its echoes
died away when the rag-pickers were already at work among the ruins, in
quest of cutlet-bones and waste paper.
And yet, think of the sacred anguish of those first hours!
Well, so be it! For my part, I will stay here, between these stretchers
with their burdens of anguish.
At this hour one is inclined to distrust everything, man and the
universe, and the future of Right. But we cannot have any doubts as to
the suffering of man. It is the one certain thing at this moment.
So I will stay and drink in this sinister testimony. And each time that
Beal, who has a gaping wound in the stomach, holds out his hands to me
with a little smile, I will get up and hold his hands in mine, for he is
feverish, and he knows that my hands are always icy.
V
Bride is dead. We had been working all day, and in the evening we had to
find time to go and bury Bride.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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