See there--an excellent humbug. He pretends to science, and under the pretext of enlightening our people, he has visited our town. To instruct the public is certainly an honorable employment, but he is a miserable preceptor. In the science to which he pretends he is a marvellous fool, but as an imposter he is a cunning knave. Knowing his ignorance, he wisely seeks to take advantage of the public curiosity, and by working it into a state of itching excitement, he effects more for himself than the most consummate skill or knowledge could attain. His stupid lectures are nightly greeted by gaping crowds, for which he is solely indebted to the fact, that he has provoked the general inquisitiveness through the common and always effectual expedient--giving private lectures to the ladies! Arouse the morbid tastes of a community, and the silliest mountebank will receive its encouragement. What a happy and convenient thing is science, reflected Peter, not only furnishing a sufficient excuse for all kinds of familiar discourse, but also taking off our hands much unpleasant labor by giving currency to such magnanimous instructors. Here you may recognise an uncongenial creature who could not survive a single day without some object upon which to exercise his malice. Though he may never before have seen you, you may rest assured he will report you a villain, or something not far removed from one. Of course, it is his especial business to know all concerning you and your possessions, and his imagination will readily account for everything: in such a manner, too, as to leave you little cause for self-esteem. His only true delight appears to be in slander, and he would barter heaven for a bit of scandal; yet it were folly to endeavor to avoid him, for he is not without numerous counterparts whom you could scarcely hope to escape, though you should immediately quit the town. Should we now, reflected Peter, revive the ancient punishment of the Poles, who publicly forced the slanderer beneath a table and there compelled him to bark three several times, declaring that he “had lied like a dog,” what a fearful and terrific yelling and howling would suddenly be set up in the world!