Domestic fiction; Sisters -- Fiction; Women -- England -- Fiction
And then, on this last day of the year, the second year of her shame
and of her heart's widowhood, Mr. Scales had reappeared. She had gone
casually into the shop and found him talking to her mother and Mr.
Povey. He had come back to the provincial round and to her. She shook
his hand and fled, because she could not have stayed. None had noticed
her agitation, for she had held her body as in a vice. She knew the
reason neither of his absence nor of his return. She knew nothing. And
not a word had been said at meals. And the day had gone and the night
come; and now she was in chapel, with Constance by her side and Gerald
Scales in her soul! Happy beyond previous conception of happiness!
Wretched beyond an unutterable woe! And none knew! What was she to pray
for? To what purpose and end ought she to steel herself? Ought she to
hope, or ought she to despair? "O God, help me!" she kept whispering to
Jehovah whenever the heavenly vision shone through the wrack of her
meditation. "O God, help me!" She had a conscience that, when it was in
the mood for severity, could be unspeakably cruel to her.
And whenever she looked, with dry, hot eyes, through her gloved
fingers, she saw in front of her on the wall a marble tablet inscribed
in gilt letters, the cenotaph! She knew all the lines by heart, in
their spacious grandiloquence; lines such as:
EVER READY WITH HIS TONGUE HIS PEN AND HIS PURSE TO HELP THE CHURCH OF
HIS FATHERS IN HER HE LIVED AND IN HER HE DIED CHERISHING A DEEP AND
ARDENT AFFECTION FOR HIS BELOVED FAITH AND CREED.
And again:
HIS SYMPATHIES EXTENDED BEYOND HIS OWN COMMUNITY HE WAS ALWAYS TO THE
FORE IN GOOD WORKS AND HE SERVED THE CIRCUIT THE TOWN AND THE DISTRICT
WITH GREAT ACCEPTANCE AND USEFULNESS.
Thus had Mr. Critchlow's vanity been duly appeased.
As the minutes sped in the breathing silence of the chapel the
emotional tension grew tighter; worshippers sighed heavily, or called
upon Jehovah for a sign, or merely coughed an invocation. And then at
last the clock in the middle of the balcony gave forth the single
stroke to which it was limited; the ministers rose, and the
congregation after them; and everybody smiled as though it was the
millennium, and not simply the new year, that had set in. Then,
faintly, through walls and shut windows, came the sound of bells and of
steam syrens and whistles. The superintendent minister opened his
hymn-book, and the hymn was sung which had been sung in Wesleyan
Chapels on New Year's morn since the era of John Wesley himself. The
organ finished with a clanguor of all its pipes; the minister had a few
last words with Jehovah, and nothing was left to do except to persevere
in well-doing. The people leaned towards each other across the high
backs of the pews.
"A happy New Year!"
"Eh, thank ye! The same to you!"
"Another Watch Night service over!"
"Eh, yes!" And a sigh.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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