The Ordeal by Fire: By a Sergeant in the French ArmyBerger, Marcel
General
The Ordeal by Fire: By a Sergeant in the French Army
Berger, Marcel
Soldiers -- Fiction; World War, 1914-1918 -- France -- Fiction
This miracle of her persistent affection seemed to me the simplest
and most natural reality. Since the milk of human kindness was not an
empty saying! And then one might have mistrusted another, but she,
like myself, had deliberately raised herself above the common sphere
in which men's feelings move. How little the scruples and hesitations
of average souls could count for in comparison with the mute vow which
bound us. We belonged to each other, whatever might happen!
But, nevertheless, when the first transport was over, a vague feeling
of unrest returned to skim the surface of my mind. I was insatiable. It
seemed to me that I might have looked for a more tender and impassioned
abandonment--for some involuntary avowal....
And then, no! On thinking it over, I had no difficulty in convincing
myself that it was her modesty which forbade her to declare herself.
I myself had never dared to put it into writing. No; our engagement
would be ratified by a hand-clasp, by the chaste exchange of words.
I wrote her eight pages that same evening. Our correspondence was
resumed. Each of us now, certainly waited for the other's letter to
arrive before answering it--and the posts were still uncertain, a week
sometimes went by without bringing the looked-for letter.
I was not without regret for the time when our love had found a way
to express itself, every, or almost every day. We had ceased to move
amongst those unique circumstances when not an hour must be lost in
pouring out all one's heart, since each letter, received or despatched,
might be the last. This was the return to normal conditions; letters
between the betrothed before the ring has been given. It was at least
something on which to feed the certainty of our happiness.
* * * * *
Time went on and on. At the end of a fortnight they had given my leg
a thorough dressing for the first time. The compresses, with the aid
of hot water, had come off more quickly, and given me less pain than I
had feared they might. Bujard congratulated me on the condition of my
wound. There was no trace of suppuration. Three weeks more and I should
get up!
I smiled at his words of encouragement. I marvelled at feeling nothing
at the severed stump but a sort of tickling which was sometimes, by the
way, almost intolerable. The feeling that my right thigh had nothing to
counter-balance it was very queer too.
The occupants of our ward had nearly all recovered. Some more beds were
added. They tried to make more room, and sent away a great many of
those who could stand up. Cadieu was despatched to a convalescent home.
He went hobbling off, much amused by his crutches. And merriment went
with him.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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