England -- Fiction; Marriage -- Fiction; Teachers -- Fiction
Suddenly she was talking at him, slowly and softly at first, then in a
rising, gathering, tempestuous torrent; her eyes, lit by the firelight,
blazed through the tears in them. "Can't I? Mustn't I? You say it won't
do? You can go out whenever and wherever you like, you can go out to
Clanwell's in the evening, you can walk down to the town with Clare, you
can have anybody you like in to tea, you choose your own friends, you
live your own life--and then you actually dare to tell me I can't!--What
is it to you if I make a friend of Smallwood?--Haven't I the right to
make friends without your permission?--Haven't I the right to entertain
_my_ friends in here as much as you have the right to entertain _your_
friends?--Kenneth, you think I'm a child, you call me a child, you treat
me as a child. _That's_ what won't do. I'm a woman and I won't be
domineered over. So now you know it."
Her passion made him suddenly icily cool; he was no longer the least bit
nervous. He perceived, with calm intuition, that this was going to be
their first quarrel.
"In the first place," he began quietly, "you must be fair to me. Surely,
it is not extraordinary that I should go up to see Clanwell once or
twice during the week. He's a colleague and a friend. Secondly, walking
down into the town to see Clare home after rehearsals is a matter of
common politeness, which you, I think, asked me particularly to do. And
as for asking people in to tea, you have, as you say, as free a choice
in that as I have, except when you do something absolutely unwise.
Helen, I'm serious. Don't insist on this argument becoming a quarrel. If
it does, it will be our first quarrel, remember."
"You think you can move me by talking like that!"
"My dear, I think nothing of the sort. I simply do not want to quarrel.
I want you to see my point of view, and I'm equally anxious to see
yours. With regard to this Smallwood business, you must, if you think a
little, realise that in a place like Millstead you can't behave
absolutely without regard for conventions. Smallwood, remember, is
nearly your own age. You see what I mean?"
"You mean that I'm not to be trusted with any man nearly my own age?"
"No, I don't mean that. The thought that there could be anything in the
least discreditable in the friendship between Smallwood and you never
once crossed my mind. I know, of course, that it is perfectly honest and
above-board. Don't please, put my attitude down to mere jealousy. I'm
not in the least jealous."
What surprised him more than anything else in this amazing chain of
circumstances, was that he was sitting there talking to her so calmly
and deliberately, almost as if he were arguing an abstruse point in a
court of law! Of this new cold self that was suddenly to the front he
had had no former experience. And certainly it was true to say that at
that moment there was not in him an atom of jealousy.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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