Riperdá, Juan Guillermo, Duke of, 1680-1737 -- Fiction; Wharton, Philip Wharton, Duke of, 1698-1731 -- Fiction
Ferdinand had turned his despairing eyes on Alice, and saw her head
bent on her bosom, with tears trickling down her cheeks. Those tears
acted on his soul like dew on the parched earth, and, unconscious of
the intention, he found himself at her side; he had taken her hand, he
had murmured some indistinct sounds in her ear; but they suffused her
face with blushes, and confused and agitated she withdrew her hand,
and glided out of sight to a seat behind the window curtain. Ferdinand
followed her with his eyes; but while he exultingly felt that her pure
image possessed him wholly, he shrunk from the recollection of how
unworthy his transgressions had made him of aspiring to the possession
of so spotless a being. Nay, were it possible that penitence could
so wash his stains away, as to restore him to the self-respect
which is indispensible to the manly character, and above all to the
consciousness of him who takes upon himself to be the protector and the
happiness of a virtuous woman; was he not aware that even this blessed
regeneration could not avail him here? He well knew that his father's
bigotry would sooner see him die than allow him to perish, soul and
body; which he would suppose must be the consequence, should he permit
him to marry a daughter of the church of England. To acknowledge
his sentiments for Alice to the Marquis, was only to call down his
malediction on their object. And, under these circumstances, to reveal
more of them to herself, than his surprised heart had already betrayed,
seemed to him a base sacrifice to his own immediate gratification,
at the expence of his honour and her future comfort. He was not so
illread in female character as to be ignorant that he had made an
impression on the heart of this artless child of nature. No one present
appeared to suspect what was passing in the bosoms of either. Could he
then, knowing that the bar was insuperable between him and her, could
he act the double treachery of fastening affections, that must be
hopeless, upon him; and make so ungrateful a return to the hospitality
of her uncle and her mother, as to devote the youth of their beloved
child to tears and disappointment? "No," said he to himself, "I will
not load my already burdened soul with the guilt of rendering her
unhappy; of having come hither on a demon's errand, to lay waste all
that paradise of smiles! I deserve to go hence, as I came, a lonely,
unregretted wretch."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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