"But it will be better still," he urged, "to be with him. What can a
boy do without his mother?"
She bent her head forward, gazing into his eyes as if she were trying
to read his very soul; then she threw it backward with a sharp moan,
shaking his hands from hers with a tragic gesture.
"He would be ashamed," she said. "Now he is too young to know that he
is better without his mother."
She looked around the familiar studio with a sweeping, panting glance;
then she turned again to Fenton, clasping both his hands with one of
hers.
"Think of what I have done for you," she said; "and write me about him.
I shall die if you do not."
And there shot through Fenton's mind a sense of the terrible tragedy
which lay in such an appeal for such an end.
When she was gone, Fenton consoled himself with the reflection that the
lack of money would prevent Ninitta from carrying out her wild whim.
He, of course, could not know that soon after Nino's birth Herman had
started a fund for him in a savings bank, and to the mother's intense
gratification had the deposits made in her name as trustee. He had
taught Ninitta to sign her name; and great had been her pleasure in
watching the little fund grow. It indicated the desperateness of her
resolve, that now she broke into this cherished fund, drawing barely
enough money to take her back to Capri. She was going away for Nino's
sake she argued with herself, and that justified even this.
All through the day she busied herself with preparations for departure.
She would take nothing but the barest necessities; only that the
hand-satchel into which she compressed her few belongings held Nino's
first baby socks, a lock of his hair, his picture, a broken toy, and
other dear trifles, each of which she packed wet with tears and covered
with kisses.
Late in the afternoon she took Nino into her chamber alone to bid him
good-by. Her limbs failed her as the door closed and he stood looking
at her in innocent wonder. She sank into a chair, faint and trembling,
soul and body rent with an intolerable anguish so great that for a
moment she wondered if she were not dying.
"What is the matter, mamma?" Nino cried out in his musical Italian,
running across the room to stand by her knee.
He took one of her hands in his, stroking it softly and looking up into
her face with pity and wonder.
"I am going away, Nino," she said, speaking with a mighty effort. "You
must be a good boy and always mind and love papa. And, oh!" she cried,
her self-control breaking down, "love me too, Nino; love me, love me."
She clasped her arms convulsively about his neck, but she choked the
first sob that rose in her throat. She did not dare give way. She
instinctively knew that she needed all her strength to carry her
through what she had undertaken. She kissed the startled child with
burning fervor. She drew him into her lap and held him close to her.
Her very lips were white.
"Nino," she said, "can you remember something to say to papa?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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