The Physiology of Marriage, CompleteBalzac, Honoré de
General
The Physiology of Marriage, Complete
Balzac, Honoré de
Marriage -- Humor
“I hope,” said Madame B-----, “that you will not prevent Louise from
coming to the ball which I am giving this week.”
The baron made her a respectful bow.
This ball was a triumph of Madame B-----‘s and the ruin of the husband
of Louise; for he became desperately enamored of Emilie, to whom he
would have sacrificed a hundred lawful wives.
Some months after that evening on which the baron gained some hopes of
succeeding with his wife’s friend, he found himself one morning at the
house of Madame B-----, when the maid came to announce the Baroness de
V-----.
“Ah!” cried Emilie, “if Louise were to see you with me at such an hour
as this, she would be capable of compromising me. Go into that closet
and don’t make the least noise.”
The husband, caught like a mouse in a trap, concealed himself in the
closet.
“Good-day, my dear!” said the two women, kissing each other.
“Why are you come so early?” asked Emilie.
“Oh! my dear, cannot you guess? I came to have an understanding with
you!”
“What, a duel?”
“Precisely, my dear. I am not like you, not I! I love my husband and am
jealous of him. You! you are beautiful, charming, you have the right to
be a coquette, you can very well make fun of B-----, to whom your virtue
seems to be of little importance. But as you have plenty of lovers in
society, I beg you that you will leave me my husband. He is always
at your house, and he certainly would not come unless you were the
attraction.”
“What a very pretty jacket you have on.”
“Do you think so? My maid made it.”
“Then I shall get Anastasia to take a lesson from Flore--”
“So, then, my dear, I count on your friendship to refrain from bringing
trouble in my house.”
“But, my child, I do not know how you can conceive that I should fall in
love with your husband; he is coarse and fat as a deputy of the centre.
He is short and ugly--Ah! I will allow that he is generous, but that is
all you can say for him, and this is a quality which is all in all only
to opera girls; so that you can understand, my dear, that if I were
choosing a lover, as you seem to suppose I am, I wouldn’t choose an old
man like your baron. If I have given him any hopes, if I have received
him, it was certainly for the purpose of amusing myself, and of giving
you liberty; for I believed you had a weakness for young Rostanges.”
“I?” exclaimed Louise, “God preserve me from it, my dear; he is the most
intolerable coxcomb in the world. No, I assure you, I love my husband!
You may laugh as you choose; it is true. I know it may seem ridiculous,
but consider, he has made my fortune, he is no miser, and he is
everything to me, for it has been my unhappy lot to be left an orphan.
Now even if I did not love him, I ought to try to preserve his esteem.
Have I a family who will some day give me shelter?”
“Come, my darling, let us speak no more about it,” said Emilie,
interrupting her friend, “for it tires me to death.”
After a few trifling remarks the baroness left.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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