The Physiology of Marriage, Part 1Balzac, Honoré de
Philosophy
The Physiology of Marriage, Part 1
Balzac, Honoré de
Marriage -- Humor
All this delightful promptness of an earlier day gradually faded away.
Wounded to find her will counted as nothing, your wife will attempt,
nevertheless, to reassert it by means of a system developed gradually,
and from day to day, with increased energy.
This system is founded upon what we may call the dignity of the
married woman. The first effect of this system is to mingle with your
pleasures a certain reserve and a certain lukewarmness, of which you
are the sole judge.
According to the greater or lesser violence of your sensual passion,
you have perhaps discerned some of those twenty-two pleasures which in
other times created in Greece twenty-two kinds of courtesans, devoted
especially to these delicate branches of the same art. Ignorant and
simple, curious and full of hope, your young wife may have taken some
degrees in this science as rare as it is unknown, and which we
especially commend to the attention of the future author of
_Physiology of Pleasure_.
Lacking all these different kinds of pleasure, all these caprices of
soul, all these arrows of love, you are reduced to the most common of
love fashions, of that primitive and innocent wedding gait, the calm
homage which the innocent Adam rendered to our common Mother and which
doubtless suggested to the Serpent the idea of taking them in. But a
symptom so complete is not frequent. Most married couples are too good
Christians to follow the usages of pagan Greece, so we have ranged,
among the last symptoms, the appearance in the calm nuptial couch of
those shameless pleasures which spring generally from lawless passion.
In their proper time and place we will treat more fully of this
fascinating diagnostic; at this point, things are reduced to a
listlessness and conjugal repugnance which you alone are in a
condition to appreciate.
At the same time that she is ennobling by her dignity the objects of
marriage, your wife will pretend that she ought to have her opinion
and you yours. "In marrying," she will say, "a woman does not vow that
she will abdicate the throne of reason. Are women then really slaves?
Human laws can fetter the body; but the mind!--ah! God has placed it
so near Himself that no human hand can touch it."
These ideas necessarily proceed either from the too liberal teachings
which you have allowed her to receive, or from some reflections which
you have permitted her to make. A whole Meditation has been devoted to
_Home Instruction_.
Then your wife begins to say, "_My_ chamber, _my_ bed, _my_
apartment." To many of your questions she will reply, "But, my dear,
this is no business of yours!" Or: "Men have their part in the
direction of the house, and women have theirs." Or, laughing at men
who meddle in household affairs, she will affirm that "men do not
understand some things."
The number of things which you do not understand increases day by day.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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