His new companion regarded him with a watery blue eye. “All-fired nuisance, ain’t it? Gosh, they yelp like seals at the Cliff House! I wish the sergeant would turn the hose on ’em. I would. They go off every twenty minutes, like a Connecticut alarm-clock. Never mind, we’ll get out of this soon. What were you pulled for?” Coffin narrated his adventures in Chinatown. “Oh, you’re all right, then, it’s just a periodical spasm of virtue by the police. But I’m in for it. They’re goin’ to sock it to me, by Jiminy!” “What’s the matter?” Coffin asked. The little Yankee crept over to the Freshman’s ear and whispered mysteriously, “Grand larceny! They ain’t charged me with it yet, but they’re holdin’ me till they can collect evidence. And me a reformed man. I’m a miserable sinner, but I’ve repented, and I’ve paid back everything to the last cent!” His confession, which was becoming per-fervent, was here interrupted by a policeman who was looking through the cells. “Hello, Eli,” he said, with a sarcastic grin, “back again? I thought it was about time!” “Say, what’s our little blue-eyed friend been up to, officer?” the Freshman inquired. The man laughed. “Vagrancy, of course. Just look at him. Ain’t he got the eye of a grafter? We find him begging on the street every little while, but he’ll get off with a reprimand. He always has plenty of money on him. He’s nutty. Crazy as a hatter, ain’t you, Eli?” He laughed again and passed on. “Did you hear that?” cried the little man, angrily. “He pretends I ain’t up for felony, but I am, though they can’t prove it. It’s persecution, that’s what it is. I don’t mind the fine for vagrancy, but I’m afraid if I have to go to jail I’ll lose my car.” “Lose your car!” said Coffin, amused at the little old man’s vagaries. “You don’t think a street-car will wait for you while you’re bailed out, do you?” “Mine will,” Eli replied. “That is, if it ain’t stolen.” “Stolen! Gee Whizz, you’re an Alice in Wonderland, all right! Perhaps you will inform me how they steal street-cars in San Francisco, and how you happen to have one to be stolen.” “I see you don’t believe it,” said the Yankee. “But it’s as true as Gospel. I’ll tell you the whole story and then you’ll think better of me.” So saying, he fastened his watery blue eyes upon the Freshman and gave him the history of his life. THE STORY OF THE RETIRED CAR-CONDUCTOR