I sat thus for a long time. I had again replenished the fire--that is
all I know about the lapse of the time--when, suddenly, a kind of
physical repugnance and terror seized me, and I sat upright in my chair,
with every fibre of my flesh protesting against some--shall I call it
presence?--in its neighbourhood. But my real self repelled the invading
cold, and took courage for any contest that might be at hand. Like
Macbeth, I only inhabited trembling; _I_ did not tremble. I had
withdrawn my gaze from the fire, and fixed it upon the little window,
about two feet square, at which the dark night looked in. Why or when I
had done so I knew not.
What I next relate, I relate only as what seemed to happen. I do not
altogether trust myself in the matter, and think I was subjected to a
delusion of some sort or other. My feelings of horror grew as I looked
through or rather at the window, till, notwithstanding all my resolution
and the continued assurance that nothing could make me turn my back on
the cause of the terror, I was yet so far _possessed_ by a feeling I
could neither account for nor control, that I felt my hair rise upon my
head, as if instinct with individual fear of its own--the only instance
of the sort in my experience.--In such a condition, the sensuous nerves
are so easily operated upon, either from within or from without, that
all certainty ceases.
I saw two fiery eyes looking in at the window, huge, and wide apart.
Next, I saw the outline of a horse’s head, in which the eyes were set;
and behind, the dimmer outline of a man’s form seated on the horse. The
apparition faded and reappeared, just as if it retreated, and again rode
up close to the window. Curiously enough, I did not even fancy that I
heard any sound. Instinctively I felt for my sword, but there was no
sword there. And what would it have availed me? Probably I was in more
need of a soothing draught. But the moment I put my hand to the imagined
sword-hilt, a dim figure swept between me and the horseman, on my side
of the window--a tall, stately female form. She stood facing the window,
in an attitude that seemed to dare the further approach of a foe. How
long she remained thus, or he confronted her, I have no idea; for when
_self_-consciousness returned, I found myself still gazing at the window
from which both apparitions had vanished. Whether I had slept, or, from
the relaxation of mental tension, had only forgotten, I could not tell;
but all fear had vanished, and I proceeded at once to make up the sunken
fire. Throughout the time I am certain I never heard the clanking shoe,
for that I should have remembered.
The rest of the night passed without any disturbance; and when the first
rays of the early morning came into the room, they awoke me from a
comforting sleep in the arm-chair. I rose and approached the bed softly.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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