The Prince and BettyWodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
General
The Prince and Betty
Wodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
Humorous stories
"Say, though," he said, "I just guessed you were from some paper. I wish
I could give you a story, but I can't. I guess it's this _Peaceful
Moments_ business that's been and put your editor on to this joint,
ain't it? Say, though, that's a queer thing, that paper. Why, only a few
weeks ago it used to be a sort of take-home-and-read-to-the-kids affair.
A friend of mine used to buy it regular. And then suddenly it comes out
with a regular whoop, and starts knocking these tenements and boosting
Kid Brady, and all that. It gets past me. All I know is that it's begun
to get this place talked about. Why, you see for yourself how it is.
Here is your editor sending you down to get a story about it. But, say,
those _Peaceful Moments_ guys are taking big risks. I tell you
straight they are, and I know. I happen to be wise to a thing or two
about what's going on on the other side, and I tell you there's going
to be something doing if they don't cut it out quick. Mr. Qem, the
fellow who owns this place isn't the man to sit still and smile. He's
going to get busy. Say, what paper do you come from?"
"_Peaceful Moments_," said John.
For a moment the inwardness of the information did not seem to come
home to Mr. Gooch. Then it hit him. He spun round. John was standing
squarely between him and the stairs.
"Hey, what's all this?" demanded Mr. Gooch nervously. The light was dim
in the passage, but it was sufficiently light to enable him to see
John's face, and it did not reassure him.
"I'll soon tell you," said John. "First, however, let's get this
business of the kid's rent settled. Take it out of this and give me the
receipt."
He pulled out a bill.
"Curse his rent," said Mr. Gooch. "Let me pass."
"Soon," said John. "Business before pleasure. How much does the kid
have to pay for the privilege of suffocating in this infernal place? As
much as that? Well, give me a receipt, and then we can get on to more
important things."
"Let me pass."
"Receipt," said John laconically.
Mr. Gooch looked at the big stick, then scribbled a few words in his
notebook and tore out the page. John thanked him.
"I will see that it reaches him," he said. "And now will you kindly
tell me the name of the man for whom you collected that money?"
"Let me pass," bellowed Mr. Gooch. "I'll bring an action against you
for assault and battery. Playing a fool game like this! Get away from
those stairs."
"There has been no assault and battery--yet," said John. "Well, are you
going to tell me?"
Mr. Gooch shuffled restlessly. John leaned against the banisters.
"As you said a moment ago," he observed, "the staff of _Peaceful
Moments_ is taking big risks. I knew it before you told me. I have
had practical demonstration of the fact. And that is why this Broster
Street thing has got to be finished quick. We can't afford to wait. So
I am going to have you tell me this man's name right now."
"Help!" yelled Mr. Gooch.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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