My state both of body and mind was now truly deplorable. I was hungry,
wounded, and lame, an outcast and a vagabond in society; my life sought
after with avidity, and all for doing that to which I was predestined
by Him who fore-ordains whatever comes to pass. I knew not whither to
betake me. I had purposed going into England and there making some use
of the classical education I had received, but my lameness rendered
this impracticable for the present. I was therefore obliged to turn my
face towards Edinburgh, where I was little known--where concealment was
more practicable than by skulking in the country, and where I might
turn my mind to something that was great and good. I had a little
money, both Scotch and English, now in my possession, but not one
friend in the whole world on whom I could rely. One devoted friend, it
is true, I had, but he was become my greatest terror. To escape from
him, I now felt that I would willingly travel to the farthest corners
of the world, and be subjected to every deprivation; but after the
certainty of what had taken place last night, after I had travelled
thirty miles by secret and by-ways, I saw not how escape from him was
possible.
Miserable, forlorn, and dreading every person that I saw, either behind
or before me, I hasted on towards Edinburgh, taking all the by and
unfrequented paths; and, the third night after I left the weaver's
house, I reached the West Port, without meeting with anything
remarkable. Being exceedingly fatigued and lame, I took lodgings in the
first house I entered, and for these I was to pay two groats a week,
and to board and sleep with a young man who wanted a companion to make
his rent easier. I liked this; having found from experience that the
great personage who had attached himself to me, and was now become my
greatest terror among many surrounding evils, generally haunted me when
I was alone keeping aloof from all other society.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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