But the brief encounter had left Caroline disturbed, confused,
breathless--as if she had been running too fast for her strength. Her
knees shook under her as she went on her way towards Emerald Avenue,
though she looked just as usual--able to exchange a chaffing word with
a boy of her acquaintance. For she, no less than other human beings,
would be obliged to go through the tremendous crises of her emotional
existence in the street, or at a party, or in a tram-car--her real self
kept close, enshrouded by that strange cloak which hides every man from
his neighbour.
Still it was obvious that Laura knew nothing. The marriage really had
been put off for the reason stated. No one could doubt that who saw
Laura's face even casually in the street.
Caroline had nearly reached Emerald Avenue when it occurred to her that
Laura was probably going to the Cottage and would need her key. But
she could not run after her with it. She felt a physical revulsion at
the bare thought of speaking to a girl who was engaged to
Godfrey--talking to him--receiving his kisses----
It had seemed almost easy, that first night on the cliff top, to behave
decently about it all. But then everything had turned different. She
could scarcely realize now how it had then seemed so clear, so entirely
possible at once to give him up, and to be always certain of his love.
The difficulties and confusions all came afterwards.
She told herself once more as she walked along that Godfrey could not
possibly be such a cad as to throw over a poor girl who was crazy about
him just before the wedding day, nor could he be meeting another girl
on the sly at the same time.
And yet the sick trembling brought on by the sight of Laura remained
until she reached Emerald Avenue. She had no room in her thoughts for
the sorrows of others when she arrived with the key.
Miss Ethel came down directly she left, having finished measuring the
floors; and after a while Laura came back to say that she had stupidly
forgotten when she met Caroline on the way to ask her if the house were
locked, so that she and Miss Panton could not get in, of course. She
thought it strange that Caroline had not mentioned the key, as she had
it in her hand; and after wondering about this a little they all went
away, walking together to the end of the street. Here the ladies from
the Cottage turned off towards the north, and when they had gone a
little way in silence, Miss Ethel said: "Flamborough looks very clear
to-day. We shall have rain." For she hoped by starting this subject
to turn her sister's slow-moving thoughts away from the new house. She
felt just then that she simply could not endure to discuss it.
But Mrs. Bradford did not want to talk about Flamborough.
"I do wish," she said, "Laura had got the measurements of my chair. I
am afraid there may not be room for it on that side of the fire----"
So all the way home, at intervals, she kept bemoaning the possible lack
of space for her chair.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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