At last Saturday night came. But the week of long working hours during
which she had been constantly in the sea air and yet protected from
wind and rain, had left her filled with vitality, despite her
bitterness of mind. The night was not dark, because of a growing moon
and pale stars peppering the sky, and as she walked along the light
road with no care for her footsteps she found a vent for that unusual
vitality in a certain habit of her girlhood which she had almost
entirely dropped during the past year or two. Often enough before
that, she had walked about the Thorhaven streets imagining herself in
all sorts of impossible situations, though always happy, beloved and
rich. But she had since given it up, as she had put away her dolls a
year or two earlier; and she now felt a secret shame in abandoning
herself to it again--as if she had at fourteen taken to playing with
dolls once more.
So she let herself imagine Godfrey walking by her side with his arm
through hers--kissing her at the gate. After all, nobody would ever
know. It hurt nobody; it was all she would ever get. Then weakened by
her dreaming she actually did see Godfrey come forth from a clump of
dark elders and had not the power to walk straight on as she would have
done half an hour earlier. Instead, she stood still and looked at
him--disturbed, unhappy, yet with the dull bitterness suddenly gone.
He was close to her before he spoke; then he said hurriedly: "I only
wanted to apologize for the other night. I hope you were not
offended?" But he knew quite well she was not: it was the urge of that
curiosity still burning within him which drove him to find out what she
had felt--how his kiss had left her--whether he had been able to reach
anything in her.
"You didn't seem to be bothering much about me when you went through
into the promenade," she said at last.
He was answered in part; the next moment she felt his arm through hers,
just as she had been dreaming on the road, only the reality had a
compelling magnetism which was beyond any dreams. "Let us go a little
way along the cliff," he said. "I want to speak to you. I want to
explain." He spoke excitedly, with a sort of jaded eagerness in his
tone; and though she knew her own unwisdom, she went with him.
The turning towards the cliff was just beyond the Cottage, on the
opposite side of the road, and consisted of a gravel path that opened
out into a small space on the cliff top. It was a lonely spot, out of
the way of strolling visitors at that time of night: the bench in the
middle of the gravelled space lay empty in the luminous sea-twilight
with a great arch of sky overhead and the waves below catching a gleam
from moon and stars on every ripple. Though Thorhaven might not be
beautiful on a Gala evening, with futile little lamps and starved
visitors blown about by the wind, it had, on such nights as these, an
exquisite, cool beauty which appealed to the spirit as well as the
senses.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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