The Prose Works of Jonathan Swift, D.D. - Volume 07: Historical and Political Tracts-IrishSwift, Jonathan
General
The Prose Works of Jonathan Swift, D.D. - Volume 07: Historical and Political Tracts-Irish
Swift, Jonathan
Ireland -- Politics and government -- 18th century
It is well known, that the majority of the British House of Commons in
the last years of Queen Anne's reign, were in their hearts directly
opposite to the Earl of Oxford's pernicious measures; which put him
under the necessity of bribing them with salaries. Whereupon he had
again recourse to his old politics. And accordingly, his emissaries were
very busy in employing certain artful women of no good life or
conversation, (as it was fully proved before Justice Peyton) to cry that
vegetable commonly called celery, through the town. These women differed
from the common criers of that herb, by some private mark which I could
never learn; but the matter was notorious enough, and sufficiently
talked of, and about the same period was the cry of celery brought over
into this kingdom. But since there is not at this present, the least
occasion to suspect the loyalty of our criers upon that article, I am
content that it may still be tolerated.
I shall mention but one cry more, which hath any reference to politics;
but is indeed, of all others the most insolent, as well as treasonable,
under our present happy Establishment. I mean that of turnups; not of
turnips, according to the best orthography, but absolutely turnups.
Although this cry be of an older date than some of the preceding
enormities, for it began soon after the Revolution; yet was it never
known to arrive at so great a height, as during the Earl of Oxford's
power. Some people, (whom I take to be private enemies) are, indeed, as
ready as myself to profess their disapprobation of this cry, on pretence
that it began by the contrivance of certain old procuresses, who kept
houses of ill-fame, where lewd women met to draw young men into vice.
And this they pretend to prove by some words in the cry; because, after
the crier had bawled out, "Turnups, ho, buy my dainty turnups," he would
sometimes add the two following verses:--
"Turn up the mistress, and turn up the maid,
And turn up the daughter, and be not afraid."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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