The Prose Works of Jonathan Swift, D.D. - Volume 07: Historical and Political Tracts-IrishSwift, Jonathan
General
The Prose Works of Jonathan Swift, D.D. - Volume 07: Historical and Political Tracts-Irish
Swift, Jonathan
Ireland -- Politics and government -- 18th century
The incurable envious, are in vast quantities
throughout this whole nation. Nor can it reasonably
be expected that their numbers should lessen, while
fame and honours are heaped upon some particular
persons, as the public reward of their superior
accomplishments, while others, who are equally excellent,
in their own opinions, are constrained to
live unnoticed and contemned. And, as it would
be impossible to provide for all those who are possessed
with this distemper, I should consent to admit
only twenty thousand at first, by way of experiment,
amounting to 1000
Of the incurable vain, affected, and impertinent,
I should at least admit ten thousand; which number
I am confident will appear very inconsiderable, if
we include all degrees of females, from the duchess
to the chambermaid; all poets, who have had a little
success, especially in the dramatic way, and all
players, who have met with a small degree of approbation.
Amounting only to 500
By which plain computation it is evident, that two hundred thousand
persons will be daily provided for, and the allowance for maintaining
this collection of incurables may be seen in the following account.
Per day.
_For the Incurable_
Fools, being 20,000 at one shilling each L1000
Knaves 30,000 ditto 1500
Scolds 30,000 1500
Scribblers 40,000 2000
Coxcombs 10,000 500
Infidels 10,000 500
Liars 30,000 1500
_For the Incurably_
Envious 20,000 1000
Vain 10,000 500
_______ ______
Total maintained, 200,000 Total expense, L10,000
M. Th. H.
From whence it appears, that the daily expense
will amount to such a sum, as in 365
days comes to L3,650,000
And I am fully satisfied that a sum, much greater than this, may easily
be raised, with all possible satisfaction to the subject, and without
interfering in the least with the revenues of the crown.
In the first place, a large proportion of this sum might be raised by
the voluntary contribution of the inhabitants.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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