The Prussian OfficerLawrence, D. H. (David Herbert)
General
The Prussian Officer
Lawrence, D. H. (David Herbert)
Fiction; Short stories
A spasm of torture crossed his eyes, which held her fixed.
“I—I——” he began, but he could not speak. Something drew him from his
chair to her. She stood motionless, spellbound, like a creature given
up as prey. He put his hand tentatively, uncertainly, on her arm. The
expression of his face was strange and inhuman. She stood utterly
motionless. Then clumsily he put his arms round her, and took her,
cruelly, blindly, straining her till she nearly lost consciousness,
till he himself had almost fallen.
Then, gradually, as he held her gripped, and his brain reeled round,
and he felt himself falling, falling from himself, and whilst she,
yielded up, swooned to a kind of death of herself, a moment of utter
darkness came over him, and they began to wake up again as if from a
long sleep. He was himself.
After a while his arms slackened, she loosened herself a little, and
put her arms round him, as he held her. So they held each other close,
and hid each against the other for assurance, helpless in speech. And
it was ever her hands that trembled more closely upon him, drawing him
nearer into her, with love.
And at last she drew back her face and looked up at him, her eyes wet,
and shining with light. His heart, which saw, was silent with fear. He
was with her. She saw his face all sombre and inscrutable, and he
seemed eternal to her. And all the echo of pain came back into the
rarity of bliss, and all her tears came up.
“I love you,” she said, her lips drawn and sobbing. He put down his
head against her, unable to hear her, unable to bear the sudden coming
of the peace and passion that almost broke his heart. They stood
together in silence whilst the thing moved away a little.
At last she wanted to see him. She looked up. His eyes were strange and
glowing, with a tiny black pupil. Strange, they were, and powerful over
her. And his mouth came to hers, and slowly her eyelids closed, as his
mouth sought hers closer and closer, and took possession of her.
They were silent for a long time, too much mixed up with passion and
grief and death to do anything but hold each other in pain and kiss
with long, hurting kisses wherein fear was transfused into desire. At
last she disengaged herself. He felt as if his heart were hurt, but
glad, and he scarcely dared look at her.
“I’m glad,” she said also.
He held her hands in passionate gratitude and desire. He had not yet
the presence of mind to say anything. He was dazed with relief.
“I ought to go,” she said.
He looked at her. He could not grasp the thought of her going, he knew
he could never be separated from her any more. Yet he dared not assert
himself. He held her hands tight.
“Your face is black,” she said.
He laughed.
“Yours is a bit smudged,” he said.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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