Maurice wondered afterward how he looked when she sped this shaft, for
he saw her shrink and pale. She even stammered some sort of an apology;
but he did not heed it. Although he was sure that he should sooner or
later have come to the same conclusion whether he had met Berenice or
not, he knew in his secret heart that there was in her words some savor
at least of truth. He felt their bitterness to his heart's core, and
could only stand speechless, reproaching her with his glance. If they
were true it was cruel for her to say them. He regarded her a moment,
and then turned toward the long French window by which they had come
out of the house. Berenice recovered herself instantly, and behaved as
if nothing had occurred to mar the serenity of their talk.
"Yes," she said in an even voice, "you are right. It is becoming too
cold to stay out here."
He held open the window for her, and she swept past him with a soft
rustle and a faint breath of perfume. He did not follow, but drew the
window to behind her and continued his promenade alone until he was
summoned to dinner. All his glorious air-castles had fallen in ruins
about his feet, and he rated himself as a fool for having come to
Beverly Farms to meet this girl who evidently flouted him.
The result of this conversation was to bring Maurice to the resolution
to return to town. All the doubts which had been in his mind arose like
ghosts ill exorcised, more tangible and more insistent than ever. He
realized that he had come here fully persuaded in his secret heart that
Miss Morison must love him, and with the hope of winning some proof of
it. Now he assured himself that she did not care for him and that he
had been a fool to indulge in a dream so absurd. The obstacles which
lay between them presented themselves to him in a dismal array. He
decided that she could have no respect for him, or she could not have
thrown at him the implication that he had apostatized from selfish
motives. With all the awful solemnity with which a man deeply in love
examines trifles, he recalled her looks and words, deciding that he was
to her nothing more than the butt of her light contempt; and secretly
wondering when and where he should see her again, he decided to leave
her forever.
He announced his determination next morning to his hostess. As he could
not well give the real reason for his decision, and had no experience
in social finesse, he came off badly when asked why he had come to this
sudden decision. He could not equivocate; and when Mrs. Wilson asked
him point-blank if Berenice had been treating him badly, he could only
take refuge in the reply that it was not for him to criticise what Miss
Morison chose to do. He persisted in his resolution to return to
Boston, feeling obstinately that he could not with dignity remain where
he was while Berenice was there. A man of the world would at once have
seen the folly of such a course, but Maurice was not a man of the world.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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