The Pursuit of Happiness: A Book of Studies and StrowingsBrinton, Daniel G. (Daniel Garrison)
Philosophy
The Pursuit of Happiness: A Book of Studies and Strowings
Brinton, Daniel G. (Daniel Garrison)
Happiness
The attraction of woman for man is her invisible presage of
motherhood. This it is which lends the nameless charm to the maiden
and the sacred dignity to the matron. Around her, centre all those
sentiments which constitute the Home, the family, and the parental
affections. These find their proper expression in Marriage.
The history of the institution of marriage is a curious narrative.
Every conceivable relation of the sexes has been established by one
community or another, and sanctioned by the moral sense of the time
and place. There have been hordes where the relations have been
communal or miscellaneous; others, where a man had many wives; others,
as in Thibet to-day, where the woman would have many husbands;
sometimes the woman selects the man, at others the man the woman, and
elsewhere the marriage is arranged by third parties; in some, marriage
is indissoluble, in others, more or less easily annulled; while in
certain religious societies in our own country the method of selective
and temporary unions has been practiced. The result of all these
experiments has been to show that the happiness of both parties is
best consulted by strictly monogamous or pairing marriages, where each
exerts a certain amount but not entire freedom of selection, and where
the lien can be canceled when it proves clearly detrimental to the
felicity of either.
Very few words will be necessary to defend the first of these three
conditions. Under whatever form we find polygamy, whether legalized,
as in Mohammedan countries, or sanctioned by religion, as among the
Mormons, or winked at by usage, as in mistress-keeping, it inevitably
results in the degradation of the woman and her subjection to the
dominion of lower impulses. To every one who believes that her
happiness demands equal attention to that of the man, all schemes of
polygamy stand condemned.
The second condition I have stated will need more defense. Especially
in our country is it unpopular to oppose the course of love. “Let me
not,” exclaims the great dramatist, “to the marriage of true minds
admit impediment.” Yet all will admit certain impediments. The laws of
many States prohibit the marriage of near of kin, of first cousins,
and of uncles with nieces, although in Germany unions of the latter
class are very common.
Immature age does legally, and should always, act as a bar to
marriage. At what period of life marriage is likely to prove most
happy is a curious question, which has never been properly studied.
The physiologist, basing his opinion on grounds of his science, would
say that the woman should be between twenty and thirty, and the man
between twenty-five and thirty-five. Dr. Johnson, regarding the
question from another point of view, made the wise observation,――“Those
who marry late are best pleased with their children, and those who
marry early with their partners.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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