"Then I suppose I may go on. Of course, the colonel has a right to interfere, though I was not aware that he was a musician; and I think I have had some little experience in musical matters, and if I had proper material I could produce as good results as any man in the service; but, hampered as I am by incompetents, and interfered with in matters of which I ought to be the best judge, I don't know what can be expected, I'm sure.--The March from _Forst_." There was a sharp tapping of the baton, and Dick drew back to go and sit down, when the spectacles glistened in his direction again. "Keep your place, sir," shouted the little tyrant. "You can, as you are here, try the flute part. Be careful!" Dick felt a singing in his ears, and his fellow-flautist scowled. Then there was a flourish of the leader's stick in the air, and the brass instruments set off in the familiar march, every man blowing his loudest, and keeping very fair, well-marked time, to the end of the strain, to be followed by the _piano_ movement, in which the flutes took the lead, with hautbois and clarionet, of course properly supported by the bass. There was a peculiar jarring in Dick's ears before the second bar was played; and, before they were half-way through eight, the conductor's stick was tapping the music-stand fiercely. "Stop! stop! stop!" he yelled. "My good fellow, this won't do; you're flat--horribly flat!" Richard stood with his eyes fixed upon his music, expecting to see his companion alter the tuning-slide of his flute; but the man waited, with a supercilious smile upon his face, and the leader went on-- "Do you hear, you Smithson? That's horribly flat. Now, then, blow A." Dick raised his instrument and blew a pure, clear note in perfect tune. "Not that one; harder; your upper A." A note an octave higher rang out pure and clear. "That's better! Now begin again: the soft movement, please." Mr Wilkins waved his wand, and a fresh start was made, but it was more melancholy than the first. It sounded as if the women gathered in the marketplace to welcome the return of the German warriors had set up a howl of misery, which was ended by the crack of the conductor's stick. "Stop! stop! stop!" he yelled. "You are blowing out of tune, sir! This is horrible! we cannot have a row like cats in the band!" This was a legitimate occasion for mirth, so the men laughed, and Mr Wilkins looked pleased and the spectacles twinkled. "Now, again; and be careful, sir, if you are to play with us. Now, then!" Down came the baton, two bars were played, and the result was so much worse that the bandmaster banged his music-stand frantically. "Stand back, sir!" he yelled. "This is ridiculous! What does the colonel mean? What do you mean, sir, by pretending you know the music? What? What's that you say?" "I said `I beg pardon,' sir," began Dick. "Beg pardon! Why, you are an impostor, sir; and if you are to stop here, I shall resign!--What?"