Domestic fiction; Family -- England -- Midlands -- Fiction; Midlands (England) -- Fiction
But it was so sweet and satisfying lying there talking desultorily with
her. It was sweeter than sunshine, and not so evanescent. It was even
irritating the way the church-clock kept on chiming: there seemed no
space between the hours, just a moment, golden and still, whilst she
traced his features with her finger-tips, utterly careless and happy,
and he loved her to do it.
But he was strange and unused. So suddenly, everything that had been
before was shed away and gone. One day, he was a bachelor, living with
the world. The next day, he was with her, as remote from the world as
if the two of them were buried like a seed in darkness. Suddenly, like
a chestnut falling out of a burr, he was shed naked and glistening on
to a soft, fecund earth, leaving behind him the hard rind of worldly
knowledge and experience. He heard it in the huckster’s cries, the
noise of carts, the calling of children. And it was all like the hard,
shed rind, discarded. Inside, in the softness and stillness of the
room, was the naked kernel, that palpitated in silent activity,
absorbed in reality.
Inside the room was a great steadiness, a core of living eternity. Only
far outside, at the rim, went on the noise and the destruction. Here at
the centre the great wheel was motionless, centred upon itself. Here
was a poised, unflawed stillness that was beyond time, because it
remained the same, inexhaustible, unchanging, unexhausted.
As they lay close together, complete and beyond the touch of time or
change, it was as if they were at the very centre of all the slow
wheeling of space and the rapid agitation of life, deep, deep inside
them all, at the centre where there is utter radiance, and eternal
being, and the silence absorbed in praise: the steady core of all
movements, the unawakened sleep of all wakefulness. They found
themselves there, and they lay still, in each other’s arms; for their
moment they were at the heart of eternity, whilst time roared far off,
for ever far off, towards the rim.
Then gradually they were passed away from the supreme centre, down the
circles of praise and joy and gladness, further and further out,
towards the noise and the friction. But their hearts had burned and
were tempered by the inner reality, they were unalterably glad.
Gradually they began to wake up, the noises outside became more real.
They understood and answered the call outside. They counted the strokes
of the bell. And when they counted midday, they understood that it was
midday, in the world, and for themselves also.
It dawned upon her that she was hungry. She had been getting hungrier
for a lifetime. But even yet it was not sufficiently real to rouse her.
A long way off she could hear the words, “I am dying of hunger.” Yet
she lay still, separate, at peace, and the words were unuttered. There
was still another lapse.
And then, quite calmly, even a little surprised, she was in the
present, and was saying:
“I am dying with hunger.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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