Domestic fiction; Family -- England -- Midlands -- Fiction; Midlands (England) -- Fiction
“He was”—the mother made a quick, running movement with her hands—“his
figure was alive and changing—it was never fixed. He was not in the
least steady—like a running stream.”
It flashed over the youth—Anna too was like a running stream. Instantly
he was in love with her again.
Tom Brangwen was frightened. His heart always filled with fear, fear of
the unknown, when he heard his women speak of their bygone men as of
strangers they had known in passing and had taken leave of again.
In the room, there came a silence and a singleness over all their
hearts. They were separate people with separate destinies. Why should
they seek each to lay violent hands of claim on the other?
The young people went home as a sharp little moon was setting in the
dusk of spring. Tufts of trees hovered in the upper air, the little
church pricked up shadowily at the top of the hill, the earth was a
dark blue shadow.
She put her hand lightly on his arm, out of her far distance. And out
of the distance, he felt her touch him. They walked on, hand in hand,
along opposite horizons, touching across the dusk. There was a sound of
thrushes calling in the dark blue twilight.
“I think we are going to have an infant, Bill,” she said, from far off.
He trembled, and his fingers tightened on hers.
“Why?” he asked, his heart beating. “You don’t know?”
“I do,” she said.
They continued without saying any more, walking along opposite
horizons, hand in hand across the intervening space, two separate
people. And he trembled as if a wind blew on to him in strong gusts,
out of the unseen. He was afraid. He was afraid to know he was alone.
For she seemed fulfilled and separate and sufficient in her half of the
world. He could not bear to know that he was cut off. Why could he not
be always one with her? It was he who had given her the child. Why
could she not be with him, one with him? Why must he be set in this
separateness, why could she not be with him, close, close, as one with
him? She must be one with him.
He held her fingers tightly in his own. She did not know what he was
thinking. The blaze of light on her heart was too beautiful and
dazzling, from the conception in her womb. She walked glorified, and
the sound of the thrushes, of the trains in the valley, of the far-off,
faint noises of the town, were her “Magnificat”.
But he was struggling in silence. It seemed as though there were before
him a solid wall of darkness that impeded him and suffocated him and
made him mad. He wanted her to come to him, to complete him, to stand
before him so that his eyes did not, should not meet the naked
darkness. Nothing mattered to him but that she should come and complete
him. For he was ridden by the awful sense of his own limitation. It was
as if he ended uncompleted, as yet uncreated on the darkness, and he
wanted her to come and liberate him into the whole.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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