Domestic fiction; Family -- England -- Midlands -- Fiction; Midlands (England) -- Fiction
Still she waited, in her swoon and her drifting, waited, like the
Sleeping Beauty in the story. She waited, and again his face was bent
to hers, his lips came warm to her face, their footsteps lingered and
ceased, they stood still under the trees, whilst his lips waited on her
face, waited like a butterfly that does not move on a flower. She
pressed her breast a little nearer to him, he moved, put both his arms
round her, and drew her close.
And then, in the darkness, he bent to her mouth, softly, and touched
her mouth with his mouth. She was afraid, she lay still on his arm,
feeling his lips on her lips. She kept still, helpless. Then his mouth
drew near, pressing open her mouth, a hot, drenching surge rose within
her, she opened her lips to him, in pained, poignant eddies she drew
him nearer, she let him come farther, his lips came and surging,
surging, soft, oh soft, yet oh, like the powerful surge of water,
irresistible, till with a little blind cry, she broke away.
She heard him breathing heavily, strangely, beside her. A terrible and
magnificent sense of his strangeness possessed her. But she shrank a
little now, within herself. Hesitating, they continued to walk on,
quivering like shadows under the ash trees of the hill, where her
grandfather had walked with his daffodils to make his proposal, and
where her mother had gone with her young husband, walking close upon
him as Ursula was now walking upon Skrebensky.
Ursula was aware of the dark limbs of the trees stretching overhead,
clothed with leaves, and of fine ash leaves tressing the summer night.
They walked with their bodies moving in complex unity, close together.
He held her hand, and they went the long way round by the road, to be
farther. Always she felt as if she were supported off her feet, as if
her feet were light as little breezes in motion.
He would kiss her again—but not again that night with the same
deep—reaching kiss. She was aware now, aware of what a kiss might be.
And so, it was more difficult to come to him.
She went to bed feeling all warm with electric warmth, as if the gush
of dawn were within her, upholding her. And she slept deeply, sweetly,
oh, so sweetly. In the morning she felt sound as an ear of wheat,
fragrant and firm and full.
They continued to be lovers, in the first wondering state of
unrealization. Ursula told nobody; she was entirely lost in her own
world.
Yet some strange affectation made her seek for a spurious confidence.
She had at school a quiet, meditative, serious-souled friend called
Ethel, and to Ethel must Ursula confide the story. Ethel listened
absorbedly, with bowed, unbetraying head, whilst Ursula told her
secret. Oh, it was so lovely, his gentle, delicate way of making love!
Ursula talked like a practiced lover.
“Do you think,” asked Ursula, “it is wicked to let a man kiss
you—_real_ kisses, not flirting?”
“I should think,” said Ethel, “it depends.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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