"I see. You believe too that tears are a necessary kind of weakness
for a woman, like smoking tobacco is for a man--or swearing. Well, I
can just tell you, Mr. Seabeck, that some tears pull the very soul out
of a person; they're the red-hot pinchers of the torture-chamber of
life, Mr. Seabeck. Every single, slow tear that Marthy sheds right now
is taking that much away from her life. Why, she--she idolized
that--that devil. She hadn't much that was lovable in poor old Jase;
he was just her husband; he wasn't even a real man. And she never had
any children to love, except a little girl that died. And she's worked
here and scrimped and saved till she got just fairly comfortable, and
then Charlie Fox came and patted her on the back and called her a game
little lady, and poor old Marthy just poured out all the love and all
the trust she had in her, on him! And she's old, and she had starved
all her life for a little love--a little affection and a few kind
words. I don't suppose Jase kissed her once in twenty years; I
couldn't imagine him getting up steam enough to kiss anybody! And
Charlie petted her and did little things for her that nobody had ever
done in her life. It meant a whole lot to Marthy to have a man take
the water bucket away from her and give her a little hug and tell her
she mustn't think of carrying water; oh, you're a man, and I don't
suppose you can realize; I didn't myself, till lately--" Billy Louise
blushed and then twisted her lips, wondering if love had taught her all
this.
"And so Marthy just leaned more and more on him and let him take care
of her and pet her; and she never once dreamed he was doing anything
crooked. I thought she did, I know, Mr. Seabeck. I thought she was in
it, too; but I see now that Marthy has been living the woman in her,
these last two years; she'd never had a chance before. And now to have
him--to know he's just a common thief and to have him go off and leave
her--Mr. Seabeck, I'd be willing to bet all I've got that Marthy would
have forgiven his stealing cattle, if he had just stayed. She'd have
done anything on earth for him; and the bigger the sacrifice she made
for him, the more she would have loved him; women are like that. But
to have him go off--and--leave her--and not bother his head about what
happened to her, just so he got out of it--Mr. Seabeck, that's going to
kill Marthy. It's going to kill her by inches."
"I--see," he assented, looking thoughtfully at the flushed face and
big, shining eyes of Billy Louise. (I wonder if Seabeck was not
thinking how he had known Billy Louise impersonally all her life and
yet had never met the real Billy Louise until to-day!)
"And yet," she added bitterly, "she's going to protect him if it takes
every cent she's managed to rake together these last thirty years. You
heard what she told you. She said she'd kill you if you hurt Charlie.
She'd try it, too."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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